Our Messy Messy Life

Crying It Out: Then and Now.

2012-02-06T21:15:00.000-06:00

I always knew we would let Henry cry it out when he was a baby. I read plenty online about different techniques and styles and finally settled on a plan that worked for us. Starting around 7 months I began a long process of transitioning him to fall back asleep at night without nursing. I was quite systematic as I nursed and rocked incrementally less for a couple of months until I felt like I had pushed him as far as I could on my own and that was the point where we let him cry. I remember letting him cry for just a few minutes as a time and going in to pat him on the back and tell him everything is okay and then leaving the room again. Then at some point, it got to where he would cry and then go to sleep. Wake up. Cry. And, then go to sleep again.

Then Liza is born. And, the crying it out was instantly banished from our house. Crying is still quite fashionable for my children but crying it out in a lonely room just so the kid will go to sleep is no longer an option for us.

When I look back on Henry crying it out, I think about how cold our house gets. How snuggly he is. How he is very particular about his blanket arrangement. How sometimes his jammies get tangled and he needs a little help to get everything straightened out. But mostly I think about how much he loves sharing his bed with his daddy and how glad I am they have that time together and I try to push the regret of all those tears into a place where I can focus on today.

I don't want to sound preachy. I don't want to sound judgey. I'm not even going to write all the things I have to say about crying it out, and trust me there is a lot, because it probably will sound preachy and it probably will sound judgey, even if it isn't meant in that way.

I just want for mamas and daddies to focus on the big picture and then decide if they want to let their babies cry.

If it is still right for your family, fine.

But, if you have even a glimmer of doubt, pick that baby up and keep on rocking.

I promise you will have a sleeping baby eventually.

My son is a photog.

2012-02-03T20:35:00.000-06:00

Henry likes taking pictures with my camera.

Most look like this color scape.

But, this afternoon he snapped these pictures of Liza nursing after her nap.

A sweet moment captured by my sweet boy.

An Even Five.

2012-02-02T20:02:00.000-06:00

1. Liza loves colors. She is endlessly fascinated by repeating various color names. However, she can not identify any colors on her own. Her default used to be 'orange' but now she says things are 'blue', 'yellow' and 'pu-ple'. It's pretty much the cutest thing I've ever seen.

2. I started oil pulling today. As in right now. I am currently swishing 1 tablespoon of sesame oil around in my mouth. It is pretty much exhausting. My poor jaws are about done and I'm only 7 minutes into my 20 minute devoted time block. For those of you not in the know, kinda like me until just last night, oil pulling is an ancient Ayurvedic process of drawing toxins from your body pretty much curing you of all your ailments according to www.oilpulling.com. If it's Ayurvedic, I believe it so we shall see how it goes. All I know at this point is that my jaws are weak and more tired by the second.

3. Henry and I baked these oatmeal cookies tonight. I made them dairy-free by using 1/2 cup coconut oil and 1/2 cup palm shortening in lieu of the butter. I also cut back the sugar by half a cup. Delicious. And, it makes a lot of cookies so I am planning on freezing the remaining dough for future use. Okay. I won't lie. I'm sure I'll bake them tomorrow night. Okay. More like early tomorrow afternoon.

4. My newest line of thought is centered around biological norms versus cultural norms. Lots to think about. Too much for a blog post. More thinking is needed.

5. I just went back to www.oilpullingwww.oilpulling.com.com to check on my tired jaws issue. "If your jaw muscles get sore while swishing, you're putting too much into it. Relax your jaw muscles and use your tongue to help move the liquid around the inside of your mouth. When you do this correctly, you'll feel very comfortable. Pretty soon." Good to know.

no'poo two.

2012-02-01T20:27:00.001-06:00

Contrary to what some people think, ahem, Connie, I do wash my hair. I just wash it with baking soda and apple cider vinegar.

I no'poo. And, I pretty much love it.

Read my no'poo tutorial here.

In my mind, the baking soda is the shampoo and the apple cider vinegar is the conditioner. I suppose it's not just in my mind as the baking soda actually does the "cleaning" by opening the hair follicles and rinsing away dirt and grime while the apple cider vinegar "conditions" by closing the follicles and making my hair so soft like, um, conditioner.

It's been almost a year of no'pooing so I thought it was high time for me to come back and report that yep, I still like it. Unlike the soap nuts for cloth diapers but hopefully not like the homemade dishwasher detergent which is still on my "like" list.

My hair is super soft and while that often times equates into frizz with curly hair like mine, I really do think I have way less frizz than back in my obsessive hair product days. My "gel" is a dab of olive oil smoothed over my wet or dry hair and as long as I keep it to just a dab, it really is the perfect gel for hair.

My preparation routine is unchanged although I often have a hard time finding both squirt bottles as they are my kids most favorite bathtub toys. But, when both bottles are accessible, I put about a tablespoon of baking soda and an inch of water in one bottle and about a tablespoon of vinegar and an inch of water in the other bottle. When only one bottle is found, I prep the baking soda and then bring my little bottle of vinegar in to the shower with me to get ready after I scrub my hair with the baking soda water.

So there.

I do wash my hair.

Just not like most people.

Sh*t Crunchy Mamas didn't say...

2012-01-31T20:34:00.000-06:00

So.

This video seriously cracked me up.

Like.

Made me LOL.

And, remember I don't use silly acronyms.

But.

MamaNaturalBlog is missing a few hot button topics for the typical natural mama:

fear of plastics and bpa

probiotics (although that seems to be a jar of water kefir at 5 seconds)

nursing an active toddler

extended rearfacing carseats

unassisted birth versus midwife attended birth

raw milk

grass-fed beef

backyard chickens

reusable, um, everything

cleaning with vinegar

news articles via your Facebook newsfeed

Am I missing anything else?

And.

I think you will like this too.

I know I did.

We just can't have anything nice.

2012-01-29T19:51:00.001-06:00

Sure our bed was so high, I needed a footstool when pregnant.

Sure I like my living room seating arranged just so.

Sure I really like displaying art and having pretty things.

But I still always thought our house was quite child friendly.

Well.

Our bed is no longer high.

One "flying through the air in her sleep, 3.5 feet down to the cold hardwood floors" incident with an almost 18 month old cured of me needing to sleep in my pretty antique bed.

Now Liza and I snug down, inches from the floor, on just a mattress.

Our living room furniture is no longer nicely arranged.

Now it is pushed back and out of the way.

But, it's okay.

Our kids are little and won't be little forever.

And, like my friend Emily's parents always said....

"We just can't have anything nice."

Homemade Dishwasher Detergent

2012-01-28T22:14:00.000-06:00

Today was day one of using homemade dishwasher detergent. I was extremely pleased with the results although I make NO promises to be happy with this mixture at any point down the road. Because that's how I roll. Lots of disclaimers. Different dishwashers. Different kinds of water. Different levels of stuck and crusty food - in my case, a lot. But, I can say my dishes were sparkling and I was a happy mama because I didn't have to hand wash a sink full of stinky dishes or run to the store for dishwashing detergent. Amen to that.

2 parts borax*
2 parts washing soda
1 part kosher salt
vinegar

1. Mix together dry ingredients.
2. Use 1-2 tablespoons per load.
3. Add vinegar to the rinse-aid compartment of your dishwasher.

* Regarding borax, I am well aware the stuff is toxic. However, it is 100% natural and I would rather have a toxic natural product in my house than toxic unnatural products in my house. Obviously, it is contained in a childproof cabinet and containers. Duh.

Anybody use a homemade dishwasher detergent with good results?

Are you going to try this out?

Things I actually like about Mississippi:

2012-01-26T20:40:00.000-06:00

I've been mentally hating on Mississippi for the past week or so. It's really bringing me down living in a state that consistently ranks 50th in every conceivable statistic from obesity, teenage pregnancy, infant mortality, heart disease, diabetes, elementary reading rates, carseat use....the list goes on and on.

The negativity is bringing me down. Really bringing me down. This is my home and even if we do pack our things and move to a city on my long list of dream locations, I need to live in the present now and stop mentally bashing this poor sad little state.

Things I actually like about Mississippi:

1. My town. We live in a little university town. I like it and I like the people a lot. We actually have diversity which is unheard of in Mississippi.

2. Our house. We live in the house my dad grew up in which is pretty awesome but even more awesome is that this little house is in the best possible location in town. Love that.

3. Mississippi has a long sordid history. From slavery to the Jim Crow era to the latest hate killing last summer, this state has been in the depths of depression since the Civil War's reconstruction era. Yet, I honestly believe that great gains are being made and race relations are better each year. And, I can like that.

4. Good things are going on within the world of sustainability. We have organic farmers, grass-fed livestock operations and people who really care about the food we feed our children. And, since this movement is just now picking up steam in Mississippi, it's easy to feel like you are a part of the change.

5. I really like the weather. Sure, it's hot as all get out in the summer but that is what summer is for. To sweat and wear minimal clothing. But, man oh man, have I been loving our winter weather. I don't even think I've pulled out a winter hat once this winter and I haven't worn a jacket in weeks. Balmy winters are super nice.

So there.

I suppose I've convinced myself that Mississippi isn't all bad.

Maybe.

The perfect lunch.

2012-01-21T19:31:00.001-06:00

Just add a peanut butter and jelly to my avocado and

pink orange, grapefruit, carrot, spinach, lemon and lime juice for a

perfect lunch.

So, you want a natural birth - pt.3

2012-01-19T20:49:00.002-06:00

So, you want a natural birth. Common hospital interventions are a sure way to get you strapped into the bed and laboring in an uncomfortable and unproductive position. The following list are talking points to discuss with your ob/gyn and to help form a hospital birth plan.

Hospital Natural Childbirth Talking Points:

Labor
go home if you are not dilated as far as you would like prior to admission
quiet voices and low lights
no artificial rupture of membranes
no iv fluids, no iv/heplock only
access to snacks and drinks
tub/shower/ball for laboring
intermittent fetal monitoring
ability to move as needed
cervical check only at admission and then only by request
no Pitocin
no reminders of pain medication

Pushing
no purple pushing or controlled pushing
ability to choose whatever pushing position feels most productive
no episiotomy
labor down until you feel the need to push, even if you are already 10cm
no time limit

Post-Delivery-
delayed cord-cutting until the cord is white and no longer pulsing
immediate skin-to-skin
initiate breastfeeding before any routine procedures
rub in the vervix/delay first bath

If you are planning on birthing in a hospital, you absolutely MUST read Henci Goer's Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth in which she breaks down every common intervention with scientific research based information. I seriously can not recommend it enough...

*So you want a natural birth - pt. 1 - The basics of planning a natural birth
*So you want a natural birth - pt. 2 - Is your ob really naturally friendly?
*So you want a natural birth - pt. 2 - Hospital natural birth talking points

She is fine.

2012-01-18T21:17:00.000-06:00

Know how your kids love when you throw a blanket over two chairs to make a tent?

My kids love it too.

Except tonight's tent featured a featherbed for under your fitted sheet.

It's heavy.

I'm finally sitting down to eat my sweet potato frittata.

Screaming.

Simply said, Liza's head absorbed the impact of one of the yellow chairs.

A spasm and a flickering of her eyes sent me tearing through the house saying she had to go to the ER.

We went.

She perked up after a bit and she seemed fine an hour and a half later when we left.

The CT scan was perfectly normal and we left with the diagnosis of "mild concussion".

Thank god.

What Henry Knows:

2012-01-16T20:26:00.000-06:00

Henry knows so much lately.

He knows seeds need dirt, sun and water to grow.

He also knows his Swiss Chard never grew into a big plant because it didn't get water or sunlight.

Sorry about that, little baby plants, you never had a chance with me in charge of your care.

He randomly identified a snow leopard online yesterday.

I thought it was a cheetah.

I was wrong.

He knows all about carnivores, herbivores and omnivores.

And, he knows fossilized dinosaur poop is called copralite.

And, of course, he knows all about how eggs come from chickens.

He also knows that if you come out of an egg, you do not drink mama's milk.

I'm pretty sure he feels a little sorry for all the baby birds in the world.

Coconut Black Beans and Rice My Way

2012-01-14T20:40:00.000-06:00

This recipe is a variation on a basic baked beans and rice recipe in my favorite vegetarian cookbook. I continued to cook the coconut variation because these ingredients are some of my favorites but the final dish never tasted quite right. Finally, I added more beans, a lot of garlic and stopped mashing half of the beans......and, voila, a dish that everyone in my family actually eats. A very big deal around here.

Coconut Black Beans and Rice

*adapted from Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything Vegetarian

1.5 cup dried black beans, soaked or unsoaked

1.5 cups rice

(1) 16 ounce can unsweetened coconut milk

garlic, minced

onion, chopped

coconut oil

salt and pepper

1. Saute garlic and onion in coconut oil in a heavy bottomed oven safe pan.

2. Add beans and enough water to just cover the beans.

3. Bring to a boil. Cover. Simmer until beans are soft but not completely cooked, adding water if needed - about 40 minutes using soaked beans and up to 1.5 hours using unsoaked beans.

4. Add rice and coconut milk. Stir.

5. Bake, covered, on 350 until rice and beans are completely cooked, adding water if needed - about 45 minutes.

6. Salt and pepper to taste.

Juicy Juicy Juicer!

2012-01-13T19:24:00.000-06:00

For years I wanted a juicer but I didn't really think we would use it often enough to make up for space taken on the counter. And, we all know I'm not a fan of cleaning up after myself and I was pretty sure a juicer was the most difficult thing to clean in the entire world. But, after watching "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead" on Netflix instant viewing, I knew we *needed* a juicer ASAP! Good thing it was nearing Christmas and I have a sweet mother-in-law who loves buying exactly what we want.

Thanks, Carla!

We are seriously obsessed.

Today was payday and I was at home with a pukey little toddler and a bored big toddler.

Normally, I jump to the grocery store on payday but it didn't happen until after Mr. Messy got home from work considering our sick situation. So, when Henry said "let's juice!" during naptime, we juiced everything juiceable in the fridge. And, no, I did not listen to Henry's suggestion of juicing the onion and garlic. I peeled the kiwi and convinced Henry that even though he isn't a huge kiwi fan, it would make awesome juice.

Henry put the kiwi in the juicer.

And, we watched as the kiwi were obliterated into smithereens for Henry's drinking pleasure.

Straws make life better.

Pureed kiwi also makes life better. Since the fruit was peeled and entirely edible before running it through the juicer, the pulp is completely edible and yummy! Usually the chickens get the pulp after juicing but I just added this bit of kiwi to my post-grocery store juice: carrots, spinach, apples, oranges.

Juicing has reaffirmed several things in my life:

1. We really like juice.

2. I am not picky. At all.

3. My kids are learning about real food every single day.

4. Everything tastes better when it is made with love and a little extra time spent.

5. My entire family has a sweet tooth and we like any juice that has a hint of sweet fruit.

*We have the Breville Compact model which is a massive steal at $100. It is a serious machine and has great reviews online. And, no, they are obviously not paying me to brag on their product.

Do you juice?

So, you want a natural birth - pt.2

2012-01-12T20:55:00.003-06:00

So, you want a natural birth. You obsessively read birth blogs and Ina May is your new hero. Your doula is hired and your husband is actively engaging in conversations about how you envision bringing your baby into this world. Your birth plan is coming together nicely and you've decided a hospital is the best place for you to give birth.

With your doula and your advocate husband by your side, you know you can rock a natural hospital birth. But, are you sure your ob* will be as supportive as he claims?

Listen to your gut.

Listen between the lines.

Don't be afraid to fire your doctor even if you are in your 3rd trimester.

Questions to ask to ensure your ob is as natural friendly as he claims:

1. What does a natural birth mean to you?

2. How often do you attend planned unmedicated births?

3. How do you feel about doulas?

4. How do you feel about me laboring at home?

5. What are your opinions on birth plans?

6. What pushing positions do your unmedicated patients use? *Run far far away if he only says the lithotomy position*

7. Do I get an 'on-call' doctor or will you attend my labor and delivery?

8. What is your policy about post-term births?

9. Is delayed cord cutting and immediate skin-to-skin normal protocol?

10. Basic natural birth questions: no iv or just a heplock? freedom of movement during labor? food and water? intermittent external monitoring? limited cervical checks? no purple pushing?

*I am using an ob/gyn as an example but also be mindful that Certified Nurse Midwives (CNMs) are not automatically natural minded simply because they are a midwife. Beware of "medwives"!

________________________________________

Happenings

2012-01-10T19:59:00.000-06:00

Let's just say the bite habit was easily broken with a reward, ahem, bribe, of a "big sweet treat" from the gas station across the street from our house. Henry very much enjoyed his York Peppermint Patty and hasn't attempted to bite since the inception of his 'bite chart'. However, it seems like pushing is going to need a daily reward since we are having a difficult time making it through the morning, much less the whole day, without pushing. Better it is, but problem solved it is not.

Taylor got a mushroom kit from his mama for Christmas. We've enjoyed watching the mushrooms grow and we've enjoyed eating them. Win. Win. Now I just need to google a bit and find out how to duplicate the process without the kit. Mushroom spores, coffee grinds and a box seem like it should be easy enough.

See that little bitty egg on the left? Either one of our hens has begun laying freakishly small eggs or one of our hens is just now laying eggs after living at our house for almost 5 months. It is a mystery.

What does a breastfeeding 17-month-old look like?

2012-01-09T19:44:00.000-06:00

Belly.

Thighs.

Back dimples.

And, a little more belly.

Jessica's VBAC pt.2

2012-01-06T19:49:00.000-06:00

Have you read part one of Jessica's journey to her VBAC? This mama absolutely rocks and I especially love reading about her VBAC supportive ob/gyn.

Fast forward to 40 weeks and 6 days. I woke up to a bloody show and my mucus plug. A good amount of blood and mucus continued for most of the day and contractions were about 10 minutes apart. They really were not painful but I knew something was happening. I called my husband home and we walked around the neighborhood and then decided to go to just get checked to see if this is the real deal. I knew I had the right to leave the hospital if I wanted so about 5pm we called the doctor and headed in. When I got there they hooked me up and the contractions were 5 minutes apart and but I was still 1 cm and 75 percent effaced. They tried to keep me and whisked me into a room and started trying to hook me up to a IV. I was texting my doula and birth group friends like crazy because I was so scared these nurses were going to try to ruin my chances for this VBAC. Everyone was telling me leave go home and labor and that I will end in a c-section if I do not get out of that hospital bed and go home. My OB happened to just arrive at the hospital for another delivery and I told the nurses not to touch me until I speak with him. They agreed and backed off. He came in about 8pm and asked me what all was going on. I told him I felt bombarded my the nurses and I honestly just wanted to go home.

I braced myself for a lecture and surprisingly he said he agreed and that I needed to go get something to eat, go home and walk and labor where I am comfortable. So I was discharged and we grabbed a bite to eat on the way home and by the time we got back to the house the contractions picked up like crazy. They were extremely strong to the point where I couldn't walk or talk through them. Nothing made them feel better. I took several showers. I bounced on my ball and walked around the house and yard. I finally reached my breaking point and just wanted to go back to the hospital for pain relief so I called my doula to talk me down. She came right over; it was about 1am at this point. She calmed me down and gave me a massage on my back during contractions while I sat on the exercise ball. The contractions slowed up but were now completely back labor and very very strong. The only way I made it through them was to imagine my husband and I swinging on a hammock on the beach in Jamaica with a margarita in my hand like on our honeymoon. Since they slowed down and I was handling them well my doula went back home to get some rest. She only lives about two miles from me so that was no problem with me at that point. There was nothing more she could do and I had my mom, aunt and husband with me.

About 5am I decided I could no longer take the pain. I was doubled over and reached my max so my husband and I kissed my oldest daughter goodbye, packed my bags and headed back to the hospital. The ride was horrible the entire way there. I felt like I clinched the seat like I could have ripped it out at every contraction. Once inside I had to hang onto the hospital wall to get to the L & D through each contraction. I just wanted someone to hit me with a bat and knock me out until this baby was ready. I give so much credit to woman that can do this naturally but after 24 hours of labor and no sleep, I had had enough. They got me checked back into the same room I was in the night before and my doctor came in about 30 minutes later. He checked me and I was at a 5 and almost completely effaced. I was ecstatic all that work at home paid off. He also said my contractions are off the chart they could not have gotten any stronger so he understands when I tell him that I couldn't take it anymore. At this point I just wanted to rest. I had reached my point of no return so I requested a epidural even though I swore I was not going to get one. If I didn't relax through these contractions and get some rest I would not make it through the rest of this labor. About 8am I received my epidural and finally breathed for the first time in hours since I wasn't in pain. I prayed and prayed I made the right decision and that it would not slow my contractions. My aunt arrived who was a L & D nurse for 15 years and who I think of as my second mother which made me even happier that I could get through this with her and my hubby. They came in and checked me about 10am and I was at a 8 and fully effaced which absolutely made me so happy inside. This is really happening! My aunt was watching the monitor for me and the contractions since the thought did cross my mind of rupture but she kept me calm telling me the contractions are perfectly spaced apart and she could even see some head compressions where the baby was moving down.

About 1pm they came in and checked me again and I was complete and ready to start practice pushing=) They set everything up for delivery and the doctor said he would be back in about 30 minutes and with a smile told me you are getting this VBAC. His positive attitude really helped me to believe this was going to happen. My nurse and my aunt got me started with practice pushes and we did that for about the next 30 minutes. It wasn't bad at all and they were so encouraging. My aunt said she could see her head so I knew the pushing was working. My doctor came back in and it was go time. He was the best coach ever and talked me through each push telling me what a great job I was doing. About 5 pushes later the most beautiful cry I have ever heard filled the room.

My VBAC baby girl was here!

My doctor placed her on my chest and prepped for my husband to cut the cord. She was so beautiful and I couldn't believe I was holding her moments after she was born. It was amazing. She latched on like a pro and I can't even explain the difference in births. It was just amazing.

It was like in those last 5 pushes my body was healed emotionally and physically from all the harm my first birth did to me. I felt complete and like a woman again. Like I could do anything if I would just stand up for myself and my body and baby.

She was taken to the nursery for just a couple of minutes to be weighed and checked over. They came back and announced she was a whooping 9 pounds one ounce and was perfectly healthy. She stayed in our room for the entire stay which was night and day from my section. I was up and walking around and eating a real meal within two hours of giving birth.

I am so glad that I was able to experience this and I hope my story can give hope to other woman that are thinking of giving a VBAC a chance.

Jessica's VBAC pt.1

2012-01-05T22:18:00.001-06:00

This is part one of Jessica's journey to her VBAC baby. Her oldest daughter's birth was a perfect storm of the cascade of interventions ultimately leading to an unhappy mama and a baby who didn't learn to latch until she was 3 months old. But, Jessica follows the rule of "Know better. Do Better." and was determined to be her own best advocate for her 2nd daughter's arrival earthside.

I wanted to write out my birth story since it has been such a healing process for me so I will begin with how I got to my VBAC journey.

We found out I was pregnant October 2009 with my first daughter. We were so excited because we had been trying for a long time and had been married for 8 years so we waited a while for this moment. I really didn't educate myself on what can happen with first time births and went in blindly trusting my OB who also happened to have been my doctor since I was 13 years old, so why not trust him to deliver my first baby? Plus he delivered my sister 31 years ago and me 30 years ago.

My appointments went well and it was a very healthy pregnancy. I was due on July 14th, 2010 and around 36 weeks I became very uncomfortable with a lot of pelvic pain. This being my first pregnancy, I didn't realize this is normal and that I need to tough it out until my baby is ready. I went in to the doctor and he suggested we induce at 37 weeks 6 days; I was so excited. He also mentioned he would be on vacation the next week so it works out for the both of us. That comment will haunt me because I was too stupid to not realize what was happening. He was playing on the fact I did not educate myself to his advantage and did not tell me that since I was closed up tight, inducing would most likely end in a c-section. It also didn't help that I have three friends with 7 babies between them that were all induced at 38 weeks and none needed a c-section so I thought, what was the big deal? Let's get this pregnancy over with.

I will make the end of my first story short and sweet at this point because I am sure you know where this is going. I arrived at the hospital on the night of the 6th to have the pill {I assume the pill is Cytotec because the other option is Cervidil and it is in gel form. Read about the dangers of Cytotec here} put in to efface me overnight. By the morning no change so at 6am my OB comes in, starts Pitocin and breaks my water. Contractions were horrible. I put up with it until around noon and begged for a epidural. I still had not dilated at all and was closed tight. Around 5pm my OB casually comes in the room and says, 'well, it didn't work so we will be doing a c section.' {5pm c-section -- think that ob was ready to go home for the day?} I cried as they rolled me to the OR. I was shaking from all the meds they had given me during the day and kept passing out during the section.

I don't remember her being born.
I don't remember them showing her to me.
I don't remember her first cry.

They took her straight from the OR to the NICU because she was having breathing issues and had signs of an infection so I laid in the recovery room exhausted, my body torn apart and no baby to hold and breastfeed as a first time mom. Just wondering what went wrong. Two hours later they took me to my room where the ped from the NICU came in to tell me why she was in the NICU.

At this point, it is 11pm and I still have not seen the child I grew inside me for 9 months. I finally lost it and demanded they bring me my child- she was full term and was not in a serious condition. They had been pumping her full of formula the entire time she was down there so they brought her to me, gave me 5 minutes and took her back. I didn't get her back in my room until the night before we were being discharged so I had to wheel myself down to the NICU and make them give her what I could pump in my room before they filled her with formula. She came home with horrible latch issues and a terrible case of thrush from all the antibiotics they gave her. It took three months before I could get her to latch so I pumped until then. {This mama got a 3-month-old to latch! Amazing!} I also had a very hard time bonding until about 3 months because I felt like everything went wrong and it was mainly my fault for not educating myself and letting an OB that only cared about himself make the desicions for my body.

Fast forward when my daughter was 8 months old, we found out we were expecting my second daughter and from the moment I saw that positive test I swore I would not put her through what I did with my first.

I went to every meeting.
Read every book.
Joined tons of vbac groups.
And hired a doula.

I switched doctors to a doctor in the same practice but who was much more natural-minded than my first and refuses to induce before 41 weeks unless it is a medical emergency. His wife also had a vbac with him with their second child so I know if he trusts his wife to go through with it, then he would be the best for my VBAC journey. All my appointments went well. C section was maybe brought up once in the full 10 months I was pregnant. He really was the complete opposite of my first doctor. He spent so much time answering my questions during visits and never once rushed me like my first OB.

Stay tuned!

Tomorrow will be the birth story of Jessica's sweet little VBAC baby girl!

And give this mama some comment love. She is awesome.

Our Daily Vitamins:

2012-01-04T13:06:00.000-06:00

My cupboard in it's most organized state possible:

My vitamin basket and essential oil basket:

My kids' vitamins:

Vitamin C and Vitamin D 3

My vitamins:

Vitamin C, Vitamin D3, Liquid Kelp and B5

My favorite essential oil:

Tea Tree oil

Due to it's natural antibacterial properties,

TTO has been studied to be as effective as various antibotic treatments for Staph infection.

Yep.

You can guarantee I use Tea Tree oil on my kids' scrapes and cuts.

5 Easy Ways to Go Green:

2012-01-01T20:44:00.001-06:00

Even if you are like me and don't make New Year's resolutions just to break them in the coming months, a new year is a great place to start making baby steps to the life you want to lead.

Want to green your life but not sure where to start?

Use unpaper towels
1. Gather random hand towels, old burp cloths, washrags, etc. from around your house and supplement your collection with some cheap new hand towels.
2. Plan a system for storage. Clean towels are not to be folded. Dump them in a drawer or in a plastic tub under your sink or on top of your fridge.
3. Plan a system for dirties. I throw my dirty towels straight into the washing machine in the kitchen. You might need a "dirty" basket under your sink or on top of your fridge.
4. Never buy paper towels again.
Repurpose or donate
1. When you are tempted to throw something away, look at it with fresh eyes. Can you use it for something else? Can someone else use it?
2. Your local charity thrift store or Freecycle are great places to get rid of usable items you no longer want. And, as a thrift store devotee, trust me. If you donate it, someone will buy it.
3. A box in a closet labeled "donations" is an easy way to keep your future donations organized.
Make your own cleaning spray

1. Find a good spray bottle. You might reuse (ahem) an old spray bottle or buy a new bottle from a hardware store.

2. Fill 3/4 of your spray bottle with vinegar. Top off with water.

3. A dash of liquid castile soap or dishwashing soap and several drops of tea tree oil or lavender essential oil are optional but a nice addition to the vinegar and water mix.

4. Use this cleaning mix as an all-purpose spray -- kitchen, bathroom, mopping mix, etc.

Compost
1. Reduce your personal contribution to landfills by composting your food scraps.
2. Composting is easy and flexible. Don't let the "rules" scare you.
3. Your dirt can be used for container gardens or raised beds.
3. Don't have a yard for your compost bin? Check out worm composting. Super kid friendly!
"Meatless Monday"
1. Conventionally grown meat is a huge source of pollution via toxic waste from antibiotics, land degradation of cattle feed lots and the fertilizers and herbicides used to grow corn used to feed the animals, to name just a few issues concerning conventional meat.
2. Dedicate (at least) one night a week to go meatless.
3. If a meatless meal isn't your style, consider cutting back the serving sizes of meat your family eats. Or even better, support a local farmer by buying their pastured, hormone and antibiotic free meat.
4. Read more about easing into a meatless diet in future blog posts :)

Is going green one of your goals for 2012?
Have you already put these baby steps into practice in your life?

Spank this cute girl?

2011-12-31T21:24:00.000-06:00

I've been mentally composing a post about my thoughts on spanking for days.

It's coming together nicely in my brain but now that I've announced it, I'll probably never write it.

I've noticed that trend here on OMML.

So, if the promised post never appears,

I'll leave you with my thoughts on spanking in a nutshell.

NEVER GONNA HAPPEN.

And, yes, absolutes in parenting are possible.

Henry at 3.5 {video}

2011-12-29T22:56:00.000-06:00

Henry is (almost) 3.5 years old. He is a busy little boy and always on the go. Literally. He never stops.

His favorite things are:
-playing in the dirt and mud in our unplanted garden
-reading books, lots and lots and lots of books
-playing with his sister, I thought the day would never come!
-doing the opposite of what I ask him to do
-talking about and being with his Dada
-dinosaurs, we are still very much into dinosaurs and he is quite knowledgable about the topic

He is going to speech therapy for 30 minutes a week and we are working on his /f/ and his /c/ sound. The perfect example of his mispronunciations is how he says "fork" as "tort".

2t fits him perfectly, although he still wears some 24 months and 18 months pants as highwaters. He is a teeny little thing.

He loves loves loves life! And, we love love love him!

Here he is "reading" to Liza.

He has finally realized he can sing along to songs and retell stories of books he is familiar with.

Of course, he doesn't perform well on video but he is so cute in his mismatched too short pajamas.

Bringing Baby Earthside: Things to consider

2011-12-26T22:39:00.000-06:00

In my ideal world, every woman values her birth experience as an open door to see a glimpse of her god-given strength as a woman. She researches birth options, chooses a provider who supports her decision to birth naturally and she gives birth surrounded by people who love and support her as she brings her baby earthside. Breastfeeding is immediately initiated and the motherbaby is not disturbed during the important early bonding hours.

A girl can dream.

Be it fear of the pain, lack of support or not even considering the possibility of giving birth without drugs -- the latter being my experience for Henry's birth -- I fully realize not every woman desires the natural childbirth experience. And, that is fine. An unmedicated birth is not the end all be all for having a good birth experience for mama and baby. Obviously.

However, certain elements of birth that go hand-in-hand with natural childbirth can be attained no matter where or how you choose to birth:

1. Allow labor to start naturally.
Every day in the womb is important. Your baby is constantly developing and preparing for life on the outside, whether she is 12 weeks, 39 weeks or 40 weeks. It is also important to consider that estimated due dates are based on a woman's last monthly period. This is not an exact due date as women's cycles vary greatly from woman and to woman and from month to month. So, your 39 week induction might actually be a 38 week induction depending on when you ovulated and when the egg was fertilized.

Pitocin is the most commonly used drug to induce labor, starting labor or kickstarting a "slow" labor. Induction of labor is oftentimes the beginning of the "cascade of interventions" meaning that one intervention (Pitocin) leads to many more interventions (constant fetal monitoring, IV fluids, pain medication, etc.) with the worst case scenario being that a c-section is needed because the baby is in distress with heart decelerations from the unnatural pace of Pitocin induced contractions.

According to Lamaze, there are 5 caveats to allowing your baby to choose her own birthday:

your water has broken and labor has not begun.
your pregnancy is postterm (more than 42 weeks).
you have high blood pressure caused by your pregnancy.
you have health problems, such as diabetes, that could affect your baby.
you have an infection in the uterus.
your baby is growing too slowly.

Please notice what did not make the list -- fear of a big baby, doctor going on vacation, upcoming holiday, mama tired of being pregnant, etc.

2. Respect the 4th stage of labor.

The 4th stage of labor is immediately after your baby is born. Breastfeeding is initiated and the placenta is delivered due to contractions caused by the oxytocin surges from breastfeeding. This is the physiological end of your baby's labor and delivery. But, it is also the first time you see your baby and your baby finally gets to be in her mama's arms and rest after all the hard work of being born.

So, why is this what happens after your baby is born in most hospital?

Honestly, I can't even watch this whole video. The crying baby. The nurses rubbing off the important vernix. The mama laying in the bed with a dazed look in her eyes. The bright lights. The security arm band. The antibiotics in his eyes due to the remote chance his mama has a venereal disease.

Your 4th stage of labor doesn't have to begin like Baby Ian's mama's. Talk to your provider about delayed cord clamping and immediate skin-to-skin. Your baby deserves only the best after she is finally born: her mama's arms, her mama's milk and every bit of blood from her placenta. Within the exception of a true emergency, nothing else is needed immediately after birth.

Natural birth isn't for everyone but every motherbaby deserves a thoughtful and loving entrance earthside.

1. Allow labor to start naturally.
2. Respect the 4th stage of labor.

And, for mamas facing cesarean sections, you have options too!

Liza at 16 months {video}

2011-12-23T21:42:00.001-06:00

Liza is 16 months old and I'm pretty sure she thinks she is 16 years old.

One word best describes her:

Sassafrass....through and through.

She has more words than I could possibly list but her favorites are:

hot - she loves to blow on "hot" food

cat - her first word at 7 months old is still one of her very favorites

jump - as she is about to jump off a chair into your (hopefully) waiting arms

chick chick - our chickens

ba ba - bread, learned straight from Henry

bath - mention a bath and she is tearing at her clothes ready to get in the tub

wawa - this girl finds pictures of water in every book we read; she also refers to her milk as "wawa" which is a bit insulting in my book...

choo choo and di - trains and dinosaurs are her favorite toys; can you tell she has a 3-year-old brother?

mine - an often used word with that pesky big brother always around

dirt - she doesn't like dirty hands but she is just fine covered in dirt from head to toe

Mama and Dada - she is a fan; trust me

Liza signs some but she now prefers to use her words.

Her current favorite signs are: more, monkey, elephant, fish

Please excuse my obnoxious high-pitched voice.

I don't sound like that normally.

Surely.

The humble fitted diaper.

2011-12-21T07:21:00.001-06:00

Some days I feel a little sorry for the fitted diapers of the world.

It's like they are the red-headed stepchild of the cloth diaper family.

Mamas want ease when it comes to cloth diapering

and the internet convinces us nothing is easier than a pocket dipe or an all-in-one.

But, I'm not so sure about this.....I love fitted diapers and I think you should too.

Fitteds are not fussy like pockets and AIOs.

Without microfiber or fleece to worry with and as long as the fitted is contained within the cover,

fitteds are guaranteed leakproof diapers.

Always a good thing.

I dare you to find me a mama who has not had a spate of leaks with her pockets.

If she exists, maybe she can come and fix my leaky pocket diapers....

Fitteds comes in lots of cute prints.

Magic mushrooms AND bacon and eggs?

Yes, please.

Yes, they do need a cover or mama is going to have a damp lap but...........

Fitteds go wonderfully with wool diaper covers and

a cute wool diaper cover makes everything right in this crazy world.

If you do not know the joys of wool, trust me.

Wool makes life better.

And fitted diapers deserve wool.

It's a win-win.

Painting of the Christmas Pumpkins

2011-12-19T13:46:00.000-06:00

AKA

"Mama is tired of these damn Halloween pumpkins taking up space in the kitchen so let's paint them in Christmas colors."

See that tucked in chin?

That means he is concentrating.

See that paint on his nose?

We thought it was cute and it's still there 24 hours later.

Liza was excited to participate in a painting activity but not so excited about the paint on her hands.

Liza's pumpkin with my pumpkin peeking out the side.

And, as usual, Mr. Piggy Henry claimed most of the pumpkins as his own and refused to share.

And, that is the story behind the famous 'Painting of the Christmas Pumpkins'.

Babysitting Cooperative

2011-12-18T13:17:00.002-06:00

I don't mention often enough how lucky I am to have such a wonderful group of girlfriends. How we manage to have such a large group of like-minded, but different enough to keep it interesting, mamas in this little town never ceases to amaze me. I am truly blessed to have a wonderful group of mamas cheering me on with my many opinions and my crazy children.

And, oh, the crazy children. We all have them. Some days, we need to know our crazy children are well taken care of even if we need a trip to grocery store by ourselves, a visit to the dentist or a date night with our husband.

Thus, a babysitting co-op was created. With the organization skills of my friend, Carmen, a few ladies' nights to hash out the details and the guidance of my friend, Becky, who participated in a babysitting co-op in her hometown, we figured out a system that works well for us.

Babysitting Cooperative Guidelines:
*Chips refer to poker chips. Each co-op member starts with 30 poker chips to use as "payment" for babysitting services.
1. There will be a maximum of 16 members. A waiting list will be kept and potential new members must be approved by the group. Members may withdraw from the group and their chips saved for future members.

2. Any member may post a request on our private Facebook group at any time. The member should post their optimal babysitting scenario such as “need someone to watch my 2 kids at my house this Friday night from 8p-10p”. Members respond to this request by posting if they are available to babysit

and work from there. Also, each babysitting request should have at least one 'back-up' babysitter.

3. Each chip is worth 30 minutes. One child will cost 2 chips/per hour, two children will cost 3 chips per/hour, and three children will cost 4 chips per/hour.

4. Please do not use the co-op if your child is sick.

5. The babysitting mother should be present at all times unless the parents have agreed the father will babysit.

6. No spanking is allowed.

7. Each member should provide the babysitter with everything needed to care for your child -- diapers, drinks, snacks, etc.

8. Feel free to post any questions at any time about how the co-op works or to propose new rules.

---------------------
Do you participate in a babysitting cooperative?
Are your guidelines similar?

A morning in dirt.

2011-12-15T14:01:00.001-06:00

Can you tell they spotted the same toy?

I was a bit worried we were going to have a replay of The Bite

but I decided to keep snapping pictures and see how they work it out.

I was pleasantly surprised.

See Henry offer a trade?

Random hand-me-down Star Wars toy accepted.

Without any drama.

Hallelujah.

Now to continue with the important matters at hand.

Playing in the dirt.

Getting dirty.

And looking cute.

No faking it here.

2011-12-14T13:38:00.000-06:00

Have yourself

a very merry and

REAL

Christmas!

Surely I'm Not the Only Mama Who......

2011-12-12T20:51:00.000-06:00

1. Sweeps dirt into one special corner of the house and lets it accumulate before cleaning it up.
2. Immediately opens a bag of dry crunchy snacks for her children the moment they enter the grocery store. In our case, it's the Kroger brand apple cinnamon rice cakes AKA heaven to Henry.
3. Never washes her children with soap.
4. Has a 16 month old who thinks she has to nurse 80% of the day.
5. Keeps on driving past her house if the kids are happy and quiet in the car.
6. Always has a sink full of dirty dishes. At all times.
7. Leaves clothes hanging on the clothes line for days after they are dry.
8. Rarely showers.
9. Complains about the lack of Christmas cards received this year, yet has made minimum effort to get her own Christmas cards ready to mail.
10. Drives around with a package to mail for months on end.
11. Reads so many books out loud each day that she likes to mix it up by changing the plot midstream just to see if she can keep the continuity of the story even with her plot changes.
12. Obsesses over birth and it's implications in the global world.
13. Does not discourage her children from eating food off the floor.
14. Contemplates cleaning and laundry after the kid are asleep but never makes it off the couch.
15. Has two children, two years and two pounds apart. 26+24=50 pounds of babies.

Why I'm dairy free.

2011-12-08T20:40:00.001-06:00

If you see me at a holiday potluck dinner, you will hear me quiz everybody if dairy is included in their dish. Likely, you will also hear at least one person ask if I am vegan. I might be dairy-free and I might only eat meat a few times a month but I am decidedly not vegan. I love my eggs and I would kill for a huge chunk of Brie right now. And, cottage cheese. Don't even get me started on cottage cheese.

I am dairy-free because Liza is still very sensitive to dairy. Allergic, no. Sensitive, yes. Via my breastmilk, Liza gets a very gassy tummy during the night and eczema flare-ups on her upper thighs. Via a stray sippy cup of milk, Liza screams periodically throughout the night until she finally passes gas and fiery red eczema that is painful to the touch.

Of course, the stray sippy cup or grabbed slice of cheese is a much rarer occurrence than her getting dairy via my breastmilk because that girl loves to nurse! I weaned Henry at a year with one of my reasons being that I didn't want a toddler obsessed with nursing. And, now that I have a toddler obsessed with nursing, I am quick to admit I was wrong. My toddler old obsessed with her milk is the best thing in my world. Nothing makes her happier, keeps her quieter and gives her more nutrients than the most perfect food in the entire world. And, it's free. And, it's mess-less. And, it's effortless. Can you tell I'm a fan? That is, unless I desperately need to eat a big fat muffin bursting with butter or snag a huge slurp of Mr. Messy's milkshake. Then I feel guilty, find the tube of Lansinoh lanolin for her eczema and prepare myself to rub her tummy periodically throughout the night.

Henry outgrew his dairy senstivity by 2 years and 9 months old so at 16 months, I expect to deal with a dairy-free Liza for at least another year. Henry's symptoms were a bit different but included eczema and I suspect his constant wheeze as an infant was tied to his dairy sensitivity. I certainly could beat myself up for not recognizing his intolerance until he was almost 2 but I am doing the best I can and I choose to be thankful the eczema mystery was solved. Period.

So, there you are. No. I am not vegan and I am not dairy-free for myself. I am dairy-free because I love my baby and my baby loves her milk. And, I am just fine with that.

Mississippi Mountains

2011-12-07T08:36:00.003-06:00

Henry was so proud of his Etch-A-Sketch mountains,

he happily posed in front of the

Christmas tree!

Baby Signs 101

2011-12-03T21:22:00.002-06:00

"help"

1. It is never too late to begin signing. Most online signing resources recommend consistent signing by 6 months, but, in my experience, babies don't quickly catch on to new signs until about 12 months. Signs are just as helpful and developmentally appropriate for a verbal 18 month old as for a non-verbal 12 month old. Even big toddlers and children can benefit from signing!

2. Don't give up. The older your baby is, the easier it is to grasp the signing concept and pick up new signs. But, even older toddlers need time to understand the correlation between the sign, the word and the object or action described. Once the concept clicks, new signs are easily acquired.

"please"

3. Consistency is key. The more often your baby sees the sign and hears the corresponding word, the easier is to learn a new sign. You might feel silly signing and repeating yourself to a baby who has not conceptualized singing but rest assured, every baby can sign!

4. Start with fun signs. As parents, we view signs as a way to teach our very young children communication skills. Therefore, we tend to teach helpful words as first signs -- milk, please, thank you, more, etc. But, think about your child's interests in choosing the first signs to teach. Cat, dog, fish, fan, lights, stars, and moon are all great first signs to get your baby excited about signing.

"pig"

5. Don't be afraid to make up your own signs. There is no rule saying you must use the official Baby Signs sign language with your child. Go with the flow, follow your child's lead and experiment with different signs as your baby broadens her signing vocabulary.

6. Signing helps all babies. Do not fear your baby will be a late talker if she learns signs. Research states that signing helps baby's brain develop the capacity for spoken language in a way that simply talking to baby does not promote, amongst other benefits. As previously mentioned, children of all ages can benefit from signs as a way to promote verbal development. And of course, the emotional benefit of signing is invaluable to a non-verbal child who can finally express herself in a positive and easily understood manner.

Online Resources:
www.babysigns.com
www.babysignlanguage.com
www.signingbaby.com
www.babies-and-sign-language.com
www.lifeprint.com

Christmas, finally.

2011-12-01T21:44:00.000-06:00

Henry really got into the Christmas spirit last year. He loved everything about it: the decorations, Santa, presents, the nativity scene, special books, the lights. You name a Christmas theme, he loved it. It was a sad sad day for him when he requested his favorite Christmas song and we had to break the news....Christmas was over. We promised our little Hen Hen that Christmas comes back every year and we would celebrate it in a big way next year. And, finally, after an entire year of talking about Ho Ho and requesting the stack of Christmas books out of my closet, the Christmas season is finally here.

If Christmas is Henry's favorite thing, personal ownership comes in at a close second. This little red tree is his tree. It's proper place is on top of our piano but he really needed to touch it so he spent Liza's naptime bonding with his tree. It was a big deal.

This time last year I was in a dither over Santa. (I can't find last year's post and it is killing me!) I refuse to lie to my kids and it just didn't sit well with me to claim a fat man would slide down our non-existant chimney to deliver presents on Christmas eve. I stressed and and stressed and finally settled on going along with Santa until someone asked if Santa was real and we would, of course, answer truthfully. Well, like most things concerning parenting, the anticipation was much worse than the reality. As soon as we cracked open the Christmas boxes, I asked Henry if Santa was real or pretend. Pretend. If Henry knew the term "duh", he would have voiced it loud and clear. Now we talk about how Santa is fun and we love him even though he is pretend. We will still bake cookies and leave him a glass of milk and I am a bit too excited about leaving the reindeer an oatmeal snack and then sprinkling glitter for Henry to find their reindeer poop the next morning. It seems like we have struck a very nice balance of keeping the magic and mystery of Christmas alive without the consumerism and non-truths of Santa dominating the discussion. At least for this year.

See the pajama pants? He refused to wear his blue jeans because he needed Christmas pants to match his Christmas shirt. Thank goodness for awesome hand-me-downs.

My tree. It has built-in white lights but like everything we own, they are broken. I am a huge fan of big colored lightbulbs and apparently, I bought two strands at Dirt Cheap last year for a dollar a piece. I do not recall this event yet they were in a Christmas box with a price tag just ghetto enough to hearken Dirt Cheap's post-Christmas sale. We need at least 3 more strands to be officially merry, though. I didn't unpack the generic ornaments so the tree seems a bit bare but I figured the less glass ornaments, the better. It seems like only a matter of time before the tree comes crashing down on top of two busy body little toddlers... Presents are on top of the piano with Henry's tree. Little hands and inquiring minds are not to be trusted when my back is turned. Henry is convinced his one present has one, maybe two, dinosaurs in the box. He is precious like that.

There it is. The beginnings of a messy messy Christmas season!

A Tailgate Divided

2011-11-29T21:01:00.000-06:00

An Elective Induction Soapbox

2011-11-28T21:48:00.001-06:00

During Empowered Birth Week I promised a post on my thoughts on induction. I followed up with 10 Ways to Avoid an Induction, one of my favorite posts from recent months. I chose the informational and helpful route regarding inductions, rather than the state my opinions and risk pissing people off route. And, I chose to assume that if you read my blog, you are not jumping on the "yay, my doctor wants to induce" bandwagon. I knew this assumption was not correct. After all, this is the good old USA with our almost 35% cesarean rate and our pathetic standing in maternal and neonatal outcomes.

So, you would think I would be happy with the latest spate of hospitals declaring a ban on elective inductions prior to 39 weeks. Over the past few weeks, I've read numerous newspaper articles (love that good birth junkie Facebook news feed!) about how early elective inductions are not good for mama or baby. Besides the fact that I've yet to read an article recognizing the OB/GYN's role in pushing for early inductions, I have a major problem with this new trend.

Why should we applaud these hospitals for, according to the articles I read, telling mothers they need to wait until 39 to have their babies? Surely I'm not alone in believing an elective induction prior to 39 weeks is ethically wrong of an OB. Ethically. Wrong. Regardless of hospital protocol, no baby should be electively induced prior to 39 weeks. It's that easy.

And, truth be told, I think elective inductions should be banned entirely. Yes. Elective inductions should be banned. Who are you to force a baby to be born earlier than he or she is ready? Because you are tired of being pregnant. Wah. Because you only get 6 weeks of maternity leave. Wah. Because you want to beat the end of the year for the tax deduction. Wah.

Because your doctor suggested it? What is his motivation? Why does he want your baby to come earlier than he or she is ready? Seriously. I want to know why all these doctors are so eager to electively induce these babies.

So yeah. I am totally unimpressed with the new trend of banning early elective inductions. Yes, I get it is a step in the right direction to improve birth outcomes but I think our unborn babies need better advocates than simply telling mamas and their doctors to just wait it out until 39 weeks and then it will be just fine to electively induce.

What is so wrong with putting our babies first?

*No need to tell me how your baby was induced and everything was just fine. Most babies are induced and most babies are fine. I get it. But, you are kidding yourself if you don't believe that every single day in the womb is developmentally important.*

Read more:
Henci Goer's article on elective induction. Unlike me, she is impeccably footnoted and indexed.

Fat fails and Thankfulness.

2011-11-26T20:03:00.001-06:00

It appears I am a massive failure at NaBloPoMo. It's been almost a whole week since I've posted, which is a long time even if I hadn't promised myself daily posts. And, like any blogger knows, once you go a few days without writing, the habit is quickly lost. I suppose I could always fall back on my AP series but to know me is to know that I can't stand a regiment, even a self-imposed regiment. Knowing this about myself, I'm not sure why I continue starting these series to torment myself.

So, since this is the season of thanks and I am apparently the only person in America who has not publicly proclaimed my thankfulness, here goes...

I am thankful for:

Our cat.
Chickens.
Thrift stores.
Healthy children.
Birth videos on youtube.
My morning cowgirl coffee.
My blog readers. My bleaders.
All of my peeps on the intrawebz.
My iPhone. I am finally that fancy.

The lack of snow and ice in the Deep South.

A new baby nephew and a sister that loves me.

My house smack dab in the middle of a little town I love.

Friends. Near and far. Like-minded and polar opposites.

Parents that raised me to grow into a confident and able adult.

My grocery store is finally consistently carrying organic apples.
My budding obsession in writing a book someday. A very good book.
The surprising number of likeminded individuals in my Mississippi town.
A loving and caring husband who is on the same page with all of my (many) causes.

Unschooling, A to H

2011-11-21T21:55:00.002-06:00

Thanks to all the lovely comments encouraging me to forget about what people, near and far, think about my (many) opinions, I've decided to tackle a topic that was a long time coming but kept under tight wraps for fear of who really knows what.....

Homeschooling. Or more precisely, unschooling.

A. Now that Henry is 3, it seems society expects him to be enrolled in preschool for at least a small portion of the week. I know this because strangers, acquaintances and former coworkers always seem surprised when he is at the grocery store with me during the week. Apparently, I am supposed to shop while he is in school. Or, at least this is what I hear at least once a week. Seriously.

B. When I tell these people that Henry doesn't go to preschool, 8 times out of 10, the next question is "oh, do you plan to homeschool?". I don't really see the connection between keeping him home at 3 when he would be the youngest 3-year-old in the class with his August birthday and homeschooling but nonetheless, the connection is made.

C. My answer to that question is a smiling and nodding statement about how "you know, he has an August birthday so we aren't planning on sending him to Kindergarten only to turn 5 after school starts". Smile and nod. Nod and smile. It's not that I am ashamed or embarrassed of our homeschool plans but I just don't see the need to defend myself. Smile and nod. Nod and smile.

D. Even though I offer little with my canned 'kindergarten redshirt' speech, it really is the truth. He would be the youngest in his class, he is a boy, and he is teeny tiny. But, I leave out the fact that we plan on keeping our babies at home through the early elementary years. Maybe more. Who knows.

E. I have come to terms that it is ridiculous to worry about our children's high school education while they are still toddlers so right now I am focused on early elementary. And, isn't it convenient that I taught 3rd grade for 5 years. I feel absolutely prepared to teach my kids. I won't lie; it's a really good feeling.

F. In a classroom setting, child-led learning individualized to their unique learning style is the gold standard. In a classroom setting with 25 needy, um, unique, students it is practically impossible to access each child's best mode of learning and focus on his or her interests. So, as a teacher, it is pretty awesome to think about focusing my teaching energy on my children that I know better than anyone else in the world.

G. And, just like when I was in the classroom and pissy about having to follow a "boxed curriculum", I have zero interest in purchasing a homeschool curriculum and having set school hours when the kids are school age. I envision our life carrying on much like it does now: playing outside, reading books, running errands, playing with friends, cooking and baking and pushing those damn trains around their tracks. The world will be our classroom and I will be the facilitator. It sounds cheesy but it's the bible truth.

H. So, unschooling with a teacher mama twist it is. My kids will decide what topics we learn and my teacher brain will make sure literacy and math skills are embedded in those topics of their choosing. And, yes, playing outside in the dirt is an important topic in our family.

There it is. Unschooling from A to H.....without a single mention that we live in Mississippi which is #50 in every horrible poll about education and the fact we have no access to Montesorri or Waldorf schools. That will have to be another post for another day. Or not. Maybe that is enough said on that sad sad topic.

Whilst writing this post, I came to realize why so many homebirthing mamas are also homeschooling mamas:

If you want something done right, you do it yourself.

Chili My Way

2011-11-20T19:41:00.000-06:00

Plain jane, no-frills chili?

Yes, please.

Chili My Way

1 can tomato sauce

2 cups dried beans, rinsed*

1 onion, chopped

3 cloves of garlic, chopped

1 tbs paprika

1 tbs cumin

1 tbs powdered mustard

salt and pepper to taste

1. Mix all ingredients and 2 can fulls of water in a crockpot.

2. Simmer on high for 4-6 hours or low for 10-12 hours until beans are tender and flavors are melded.

* Soaking the beans will cut back on cooking time.

* I usually use a mix of kidney beans and cranberry beans but any beans are fine.

Summertime Boy

2011-11-19T20:58:00.000-06:00

Now that autumn is in full spring,

I am left lamenting summer.

And, this sweet summertime boy.

1 confession and 4 thoughts

2011-11-18T19:43:00.001-06:00

1. I have a confession. My VBAC post left me a bit gun shy. It's one thing to get unsavory comments from strangers on the intrawebz but when the nastiest comment in my blog's history is from an in-real-life friend, it leaves me a bit shaky. I'm left wondering if I am too abrasive with my opinions, via my mouth or my typing fingers. My inner-monologue tells me that everybody has opinions, I'm just writing about mine thereby putting it all out there for the world, um, my friends, to read.....or not to read if they don't like what I have to write about. Because, seriously, it's not like I actually spout these opinions to people's faces. So, yeah. I'm a bit conflicted.

2. Which is why I am praising Mama Birth, yet again. Her post about the 10 worst comments in her blog's history gave me some good perspective and of course, a few giggles, because I love Mama Birth and all of her strong opinions.

3. We are on the first step to night weaning Liza. Whenever she wakes up prior to me already being in bed, Mr. Messy soothes her back to sleep so I get to feel officially done after nursing her to sleep for the night. Oh, wait. She doesn't nurse to sleep anymore. She now insists on falling asleep draped across my body without my hands on her. A difficult feat as we rock in the glider. It's only a matter of time until she rolls right off my lap and wakes up as she hits the floor. It's going to be ugly.

4. Henry is so cute. As in, I really can't even stand it lately. Some days, like yesterday, I think the day will never end because he is making me crazy with every action but days like today, I wish he would stay 3 forever. Love him.

5. Henry has been saying he wants another sister.....born "in the water" so she won't be dirty. He is quick to tell me he doesn't like "those dirty babies". Think we watch enough birth videos on YouTube?

Rebel: T/L/C's Giveaway Winner!

2011-11-17T19:02:00.000-06:00

Nicole Hunt, you are the winner of 2 custom Rebel: T/L/C's!!!

Please email Kelli at rebeldream19@gmail.com for the details!

Thanks to everyone who entered the contest!

Support a fellow mama and order some Rebel: T/L/C's for Christmas presents :)

This is Henry.

2011-11-15T19:49:00.000-06:00

You guessed it.

He was pretending the stick was a "shooter". Lovely. Even more lovely is the intense look on his face. It's almost scary. I would like to pretend he is practicing his Davy Crockett killed him a b'ar when he was only 3 pose in front of this rustic log cabin but I would be lying to myself. This look surfaces when he carefully aims his shooter, smushes ants with a vengeance or is in a general mood of destruction.

So, yeah. I see that look more often than I would prefer.

Even with the evil look on Henry's face, I absolutely adore this picture......sweet little Cousin Martha in the background. Both kids looking at the camera and sitting still at the same time. A snapshot of the crazy week my kids and I stayed with my sister's family to visit after the birth of their new baby boy.

And, honestly, I love the evil look.

This is Henry in all his 3 year old glory.

New Series: AP

2011-11-14T20:53:00.002-06:00

During Liza's pregnancy I compulsively read everything I could find online about natural birth and eventually, homebirth. I would go so far as to say I was addicted to the climactic eventuality of the birth story when the baby was born and the mother gushes about the wonders of natural childbirth. I read and read and then I would read a little more.

Initially, my only goal was to bring Liza into this world as peacefully as possible, trusting and respecting my body and the physiological process of birth. But, the more I learned about gentle birth, the more thought I gave to gentle parenting. Now I see how a gentle and respectful birth is simply a stepping stone to treating my children with respect and dignity no matter their age.

In this new blog series, we will explore the 8 Principles of Attachment Parenting and how we apply these principles in everday life:

Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth and Parenting

Feed with Love and Respect

Responds with Sensitivity

Use Nurturing Touch

Ensure Safe Sleep, Physically and Emotionally

Provide Consistent and Loving Care

Practice Positive Discipline

Strive for Balance in Personal and Family Life

Are you interested in contributing to this series as a guest post? Send me an email at lmd328(at)gmail(dot)com and we can discuss the details.

Do you consider yourself an Attached Parent?

Cilantro Dip My Way

2011-11-13T13:10:00.001-06:00

Favorite dip recipe. Ever.

I even call it my "famous" cilantro dip recipe.

It's that good.

It finally occurred to me to sub the block of cream cheese with an avocado and I have to say.....

I am way.too.excited.

Cilantro Dip My Way

1 large bunch of cilantro, stems included

1 avocado

8 oz sour cream*

0.5 cup green salsa

1 lime, juiced

cumin, to taste

1. Pulse all ingredients in a food processor until pureed.

2. Serve as a dip with chips or as a topping for Mexican themed dishes.

* I like Tofutti brand non-dairy sour cream.

NaBloPoMo: Day 10

2011-11-10T20:50:00.000-06:00

Don't forget to enter my Rebel: T/L/C's giveaway!

-------------------

As someone who is notorious for not following through with things, I am pleased with actually, thus far, posting everyday of this month as indicated by the National Blog Posting Month's guidelines.

And, now I share with you what I have learned during the past 10 days:

1. I have an endless supply of things to blog about. This is not news to me but it is interesting that I am still hoarding blog post ideas rather than actually writing about them. I keep thinking I'm going to need to fall back on one of the many posts that have floated in my brain for months but it turns out I have something new to blog about everyday. Maybe by the end of the month my hoarded posts will be written...or not. I'm curious to see.

2. I need a new laptop.

3. I don't like blogging everyday. I have yet to actually sit down and write a thoughtful post this month because it takes me a few days of processing to get ready to write, reread and edit and finally post my finished process. Of course, some posts, ahem...vbac, need a little more thought than I give them but for the most part, a post of length has been pondered upon plenty during the day when I am tired of cleaning up after children and need to internally zone out.

4. I understand why people take a blogging challenge such as this before writing a book to aid in disciplined scheduled writing. Blogging during the day is absolutely 100% impossible at this point in my life and I am foolish even to crack my laptop open during waking hours because my children consider that an open invitation for chaos to reign. If I were to write a book, I would be very busy at night after my children go to bed. When my brain is fried. I now know this for certain after the past 10 days. Not good for my future career as a famous author.

5. I really like colons. As in the punctuation mark not the body part.

Anybody else doing NaBloPoMo?

Wordless Wednesday: The Park

2011-11-09T19:08:00.001-06:00

Don't forget to enter my Rebel: T/L/C's giveaway!

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Gladness: Refuge Style

2011-11-08T21:07:00.000-06:00

Don't forget to enter my Rebel: T/L/C's giveaway!

This morning I was glad to meet my friend, Mandi, and her boys at our local wildlife refuge.

Truth be told, I wasn't very glad about Liza's 15 minute car nap at 10am that I knew would ruin her real nap but I sure was glad she didn't scream the whole time in the car.

The big boys were glad to be together and free to explore. They were excited about the trail and took off running.........

Still running........

Yep, they beat us there by a mile.

I was glad that didn't do something crazy and foolhardy before we could make it to the outlook.

I wasn't so glad about all the contention that straw sippy cup caused between my children but I am glad they didn't complain about being thirsty since I accidentally left their cups in the car.

Tripp was glad just to eat his pomegranite,

until Henry kicked him in the head.

Twice.

Charlie was glad at the opportunity to attempt to scale the safety barrier.

Henry was glad to...well, I'll just say he was glad to be three.

And, everything that being three entails.

Liza was glad to have new things to claim as "mine".

Poor girl probably would have been a bit gladder had her hair not been in her face all morning.

I was glad to enjoy a beautiful 80 degree November day with good friends surrounded by lovely scenery.

Oh yeah.

I was also glad nobody was injured by two little boys wielding sticks.

An impressive feat if you know these two busy little boys.

Yep.

I was....and still am....glad.

Rebel: T/L/C's Giveaway!

2011-11-07T21:50:00.000-06:00

Raise your hand if you can sympathize with any of the following scenarios:

1. You lose the lids to your Pyrex containers because you are crazy and pack your children's snacks for the park in Pyrex. And, of course, lids at the park magically become frisbees and shovels and end up buried in the dirt. Or at least that is what your three-year-old says when you inquire about the missing lids the next day.

2. You are out of tin foil to cover lidless dishes (see above) because your three-year-old hijacked the 75 foot roll of tin foil to make "choo choo tracks" throughout the house. You were okay with this wasteful plan because he was quiet for 15 minutes.

3. Plastic wrap bunches up and never smooths out across the bowl. That irritates you. A lot.

Did you raise your hand?

Good.

I knew I wasn't the only crazy mama out there.

Let me introduce you to Rebel: T/L/C's.

Rebel: T/L/C's (tops/lids/covers) are a new way to think about covering your dishes. Made with lots of love by a work-at-home-mama, these covers are fun and functional covering containers as small as yogurts and as big as large serving bowls.

My favorite part of my T/L/C's is the versatility that doesn't leave me searching for the exact right lid that covers only one container. Especially in cases like my homemade laundry detergent that I store in a quart Mason jar that lost it's lid way before it became home to my detergent.

I think it's pretty awesome that a funky shaped bowl like this can be covered to keep my baba ghanoush fresh in the fridge without being dependent on a throwaway material.

And, because I know I'm not the only mama who questions the safety of our daily use products:

TLCs are lined with a food-safe polyurethane-coated ripstop nylon which is water-resistant, mildew-resistant, abrasion-resistant, rot-resistant, and is free of heavy metals, phthalates, PBBs, and PBDEs. The coated side of the nylon faces away from food.

-------------------------------------------------

How to win your own set of (2) Rebel T/L/C's:

"Like" OMML on Facebook

"Like" Rebel: T/L/C's on Facebook

Follow OMML via Google Friend Connect (left bar on blog

Leave a comment telling me why you need your very own set of T/L/C's!

Leave a new comment on this post for each entry, including your email on at least one comment.

Winner will be announced next Monday, November 14!

Vaxes and The Greater Good

2011-11-06T19:57:00.000-06:00

Vaccines are one of the very few topics I have refused to even consider writing about on Our Messy Messy Life.

Regarding childhood vaccinations, all I know for certain is that I don't know enough to accurately and eloquently state my opinions.

That said, I was very excited to watch The Greater Good, a documentary about the history, government oversight and the research side today's common vaccines. The website currently says it is available for free through November 5 but it is still playing today on November 6 so I suggest you go ahead and find time within the next few days to watch this 1.5 hour long documentary.

Are you going to watch this movie?

Have you already seen it?

Can she be any cuter?

2011-11-05T14:04:00.000-05:00

Seriously.

Can she be any cuter?

She is super cute proudly sporting her maroon and white....

and pigtails!!!!

Does it get any cuter?

Well...her budding love of all things books is pretty cute too.

Feigning sleep in a little bitty chair is pretty cute, too.

Although, it might be possible to be *even* cuter if she actually chose to really and truly sleep at night or during her sad excuse of a nap during the day.

The jury is in:

She can not be any cuter.

I do believe we have reached the outer boundaries of cuteness.

*bows*

Bulk Coconut Oil By the Numbers.

2011-11-04T20:45:00.001-05:00

2........equally thrifty friends.
1........of which being me and the other being Kaitlin who has a fabulous blog of her own.
1........big idea to buy 5 gallons of coconut oil from Tropical Traditions to share.
640....ounces are in 5 gallons. I am not a number person so this came as a surprise to me.
135....dollars for our 5 gallons of coconut oil.
21......cents per ounce for high quality coconut oil. This is *BIG* because I usually spend.....
1........dollar per ounce for coconut oil at my local grocery store. Ridiculous.
7........days of waiting for a coupon code for free shipping to appear on Tropical Traditions Faceboook page.
44......dollars of shipping saved!!!!

1........picture of my current stash of 106 ounces of coconut oil that Blogger refuses to load. Check back later to see my artfully composed picture of mason jars and old spaghetti jars sitting on my kitchen counter. Normally, I would hold out until tomorrow when the picture will (hopefully) load but I gotta post today's post for NaBloPoMo and it's already 8:45pm and we all know I don't like to do anything resembling anything work after my children go to sleep and loading this picture is promising to be too much work for me.

Wow.

Apparently, correcting run-on sentences is too much work too.

Hello.

2011-11-03T14:48:00.001-05:00

Hello.

My name is

This is the 3rd football season I've worn this jersey.

My mama is hoping it still fits next year too.

I'm Henry.

I'm three.

And, it's a good thing I'm this cute or my mama might not have survived this rainy day with me.

Seven Billion + 2 Babies.

2011-11-02T13:05:00.000-05:00

The 7th billion Earth citizen is thought to have been born this week. People who study these things (populationists, perhaps?) predict this landmark baby was born somewhere in India.

Did you know my in-laws lived in India for 3 years and Taylor and I spent 6 very long weeks in India during our last childless summer?

Our travels in Europe taught me that life as I know is not life everywhere else in the world. So, I traveled to India with an open mind, knowing that I had no way of preparing myself for what we might see.

So, yeah. I was appropriately culture shocked.

But, what most amazed me were the children. Children were everywhere. Families living in lean-to tents on the side of highways with their toddlers playing in the 3 foot wide median between lanes of traffic. Children pooping on the sidewalk. Children hawking their goods to tourists. Mamas bathing their children with dirty water in public. Children begging for coins. Children dressed for school in their proper little uniforms. Daddies driving motorcycles as the mama clung several small children tightly during a bouncy ride on an uneven paved road.

Lots and lots of children. Everywhere. Children doing the same things as my children but without the space and privacy afforded to us as middle class Americans.

So, when I think about the 7th billion baby arriving earthside in India and memories of our time in India, I am left with only one thought:

Gratitude.

Gratitude that even though I am often at odds with America's consumer culture of 'bigger and better', I know my babies will always have clean water, plenty of food and will never live a life where sleeping in a tent on the side of a busy intersection is their normal.

Yep.

Gratitude.

Comments on Comments: Boys and Guns

2011-11-01T07:35:00.002-05:00

Welcome to my first day of National Blog Posting Month or NaBloPoMo.

Do you have a blog? Join me! All you have to do is post everyday, including weekends, during the month of November. BlogHer is hosting this year's NaBlogPoMo and there are lots of prizes to be grabbed by daily posters.

Easy, right?
We shall see.
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I often use OMML to sort through my thoughts on various issues related to mothering and I never cease to be amazed at the wisdom other mamas share with me through their comments. On a regular basis, these comments completely shift the way I previously viewed a subject. I am thankful for the collective wisdom of mamas at different places in this parenting game that can help guide me and steer me when I am going in the opposite direction of where I need to be headed.

So.

Lucinda, I very very very much hope you were not a drive-by reader for my Boys and Guns post. Your comment completely changed my reaction to Henry's obsession with shooting and make me realize that by outlawing "shooters" I was making them that much more desirable and if I simply come to terms that boys will shoot, life will be better and easier for everyone involved. Thank you for your wise comment.......and please come back. I need more comments from you!

Lucinda said...

I have an 8 year old son and a 10 year old daughter. My experience is that they are quite different, and some of that is because of gender. My daughter really doesn't care about guns or shooting. My son will turn anything into a shooter and has since he was 3 or so.

We allow nerf guns in the house. We have a whole assortment of them. There are basic rules like you don't pretend to shoot people. We discuss the differences between "toy" guns and real guns which are not toys and can hurt people very badly. My son has never had any trouble understanding the difference. This past year he shot a 22 with his grandpa (without my knowledge) and was deeply struck by the power of this gun. I know he was taught safety and respect for the weapon so even though I hadn't been asked ahead of time, I knew it was a good experience for my son.

Guns are a reality of life. Boys are attracted to them. I asked my son today what it was that he liked about his guns. He said he liked it because it was like tag and target practice and war where one side beats the other. He didn't think about killing anyone. He just liked how he could battle. And that is how boys play. Guns are a part of that whether you give them one or not. So I believe to a certain degree you need to accept and allow the inherent differences between boys and girls and let them express those differences. To fight it leads to frustration for everyone.

For the record, my boy is also the kindest, gentlest soul I know. Far kinder than his sister. But he does love to shoot his nerf gun. Good luck figuring out what works best for your family.

Comments on Comments: VBAC

2011-10-30T21:06:00.000-05:00

So. I messed up. Not the first time and it won't be the last.

After the first not so positive comment down to the latest almost brought tears to my eyes comment, I am fully aware that my VBAC post did not fly over so well.

I still stand by my facts. As a natural childbirth advocate and a friend to many women who have experienced cesarean sections and a friend to many women who have fought for the support of a caring provider to stand by their side during a trial of labor after a cesarean, I have seen many sides of vaginal birth after a cesarean section. I know the risk factors and I know the benefits.

But, having had two successful vaginal births, I am obviously not the best person to speak on the emotional side of a cesarean or a VBAC.

If you were offended, I am sorry. I am a person of strong convictions and it oftentimes takes an equally strong opposing opinion to make me realize my way is not the only way.

The past two days of reflection on these comments reminds me of something Birth Without Fear posted on her Facebook page not too long ago about how she has come to realize that a mama's satisfaction with her birth experience has nothing to do with the way her child enters the world but everything to do with how she feels about her birth experience. And, I realize now I should have made a similar disclaimer on my VBAC (now aptly title "10 Reasons to Avoid an Elective Cesarean thanks to an anonymous commenter) post.

And, because Mrs. BWF is much wiser about birth than me......

‎"There is no guarantee a VBAC will be successful." True. There is also no guarantee that a cesarean section or induction will be successful. There are no 100% guarantees in life. That is why birth 'is as safe as life gets'. This is why informed choice is important. Choose what you feel is best and find a supportive and competent care provider and have an empowering birth! ~Mrs. BWF

10 Reasons to Avoid an Elective Cesarean

2011-10-28T07:13:00.004-05:00

1. Your body is not a lemon. Your creator is not a careless mechanic. ~ Ina May Gaskin
2. Failure to progress? Um. Most likely failure to wait.
3. Previous cesareans increase chances of placenta previa, placenta accreta, placenta increta, placenta percreta.
4. Babies are designed for vaginal birth. Wet lungs are more common for section babies because the fluid from their lungs is not squeezed out during labor.
5. Doctor error.
6. Cesareans are major abdominal surgeries.
7. Your cesarean section's recovery time coincides with the very special time you are initiating breastfeeding and bonding with your newborn.
8. Labor and delivery is good for women. Our bodies are designed for birth.
9. Hospital acquired infections.
10. VBAC is a safe and reasonable option for most women.

I often think about how it just took a friend's casual question of my interest in natural childbirth during Liza's early pregnancy to spark my path to a homebirth and full-fledge birth junky. So, to all my previous c-section mamas, please know a VBAC is a very real option! If your current provider does not agree with ACOG's recommendation that VBAC is a safe and reasonable option for most women, find a new provider!

Interested in learning more about VBAC? Find a local ICAN chapter or join the forums.

Did you have a VBAC? Are you planning a VBAC?

* Don't like this list? You weren't the only one........read my followup post here.

Babies Wearing Babies.

2011-10-26T06:00:00.000-05:00

My sweet babies are good little attached parents to their Baby Monkey and Little Girl Doll.

Sadly, I didn't get a picture of Henry tandem wearing Baby Monkey and Lamb.

Imagine in your mind a very proud little daddy in the making.

If nothing else, imagine "cute".

I see a little bitty doll carrier in Liza's future.

She desperately wants to wear her Little Girl Doll but is too wiggly for me to get a good tie with the scarf.

Any readers make teeny little buckle carriers?

I've seen a few on Etsy but I would love to buy even more close to home :)

Happy Fall, Ya'll!

2011-10-24T06:00:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's been a year since one of my favorite blog posts of all time!

I mean, really.

How cute were my babies last year?

And, oh the days where that grocery cart wasn't the object of everyone's affection.......

Politics. Propositions. Puddles.

2011-10-22T17:09:00.000-05:00

The kids and I walked up to campus last week for a rally against

Proposition 26 aka The Personhood Amendment.

Even though I firmly believe life begins at conception,

I worry about the broad nature of the proposed amendment.

AD: Section 33. Person defined. As used in this Article III of the state constitution, "The term 'person' or 'persons' shall include every human being from the moment of fertilization, cloning or the functional equivalent thereof."

What about hormonal birth control?

If this amendment becomes a part of Mississippi's constitution,

will hormonal birth control be outlawed?

I believe more women should take charge of their own fertility through the Fertility Awareness Method but I also believe hormonal birth control is a necessary component of society.

What about ectopic pregnancy?

What about terminal conditions that are not compatible with life?

I would continue a pregnancy with a diagnosis of Trisomy 18 or 13 or Anencephaly,

but many families choose to end those pregnancies.

What about those women and families?

Rape victims deserve the "morning after pill".

Women have chosen abortion for various reasons since the dawn of time.

Women will continue to end pregnancies regardless of constitutional amendments.

Those women deserve safe and clean clinics, not 'underground' facilities and doctors.

So yeah.

We went on campus for a rally against Proposition 26.

The kids had a blast.

Obviously.

I left feeling very unsettled.

Unsettled about this proposed constitutional amendment.

Unsettled about the future of women's healthcare in my state.

Unsettled about the many future implications I can't even fathom.

Unsettled that many passionate "YESers" are not seeing the big picture.

Unsettled how so many Mississippi citizens actually believe this a step forward.

Mississippians, have you done your research?

How are you voting?

Moms and Blogs.

2011-10-20T22:45:00.000-05:00

So, I've been hardcore 'mommy blogging' for a calendar year now. I began blogging when Henry was born with a 6 month hiatus after his 1st birthday but those posts, enjoyable as they are for me reread, were filled with nothing more than milestones and the occasional funny anecdote. I viewed my blog as Henry's baby book because I surely never found a baby book that lived up to my high standards of "cute" and we all know I have plenty to say about my cute kids so why not share the details with family and friends?

Our Messy Messy Life came about when I re-entered the blogging world and I realized I needed to make sure I was keeping it real, i.e. dirty house, unbathed children and unshowered mamas. So, I started back blogging when I was about 20 weeks pregnant with Liza and I was keeping it real but still just highlighting cute things about Henry and detailing milestones.

It wasn't until Liza was 2 months old and I was really into my groove of mothering two babies that I began compulsively blogging. As crazy as it sounds, I had lots of time on my hands with a two-year-old and a newborn. Henry took 3-4 hour naps each afternoon and Liza slept in the ring sling all day and I would swaddle her and put her in the swing during Henry's naptime. The house was (fairly) clean, full-fledged meals were cooked and I felt on top of my game.

I really like sleeping babies. I like cooking. I don't like cleaning but somebody has to do it. Internetting is fun but gets old after a while. I'm not crafty and I don't like making things.

I needed something more with my free afternoons.

So, I began my life as a 'mommy blogger'.

Blog posts began forming in my mind as soon as I pulled out the camera. I made sure I saved leftovers so I could take a picture with natural light if I planned on posting a recipe. The Natural Parents Network became my blog community. I found women who obsessed over the same things I obsessed over and it felt good.

I threw myself into blogging and I found it irresistibly fulfilling.

Through blogging, I discovered my love for self-reflective writing, which isn't too surprising given my love of a good memoir. And, through self-reflection on this whole mama thing, I find myself thinking about blogging and it's fulfilling factor. About all the mamas blogging. Blogging about their kids. Blogging about their lives. Blogging about being a mama. Blogging about being a wife. Blogging about the food they feed their family and the deals at the thrift store. Lots and lots of blogging.

I wondered: Why all the mama bloggers?

And, then I figured it out.

Husbands are needy. Children are needy. We have little time to ourselves and that time is usually spent cleaning up somebody else's mess. Mamas don't have a space of their own. Our space is filled with children and because we are mamas, we gladly give our space to our children.

So, we blog.

We make our own space where we are in charge. We dictate the rules and the rules are actually followed. We keep our blogs nice and neat and little people don't swoop in and make a mess of it all 5 seconds later.

So yeah. I like blogging and I like being a "mommy blogger".

Here is to one very fulfilling year of full-fledged blogging with many more to come!

To quote Henry, "chee-uhs"!

Now, where is my mimosa to toast?

Favorite Food Documentaries.

2011-10-17T20:48:00.000-05:00

I feel like I am forever picking up new soapboxes. I feel too strongly about entirely too many topics but here I go again.....

Sustainable farming.

In the past, it seemed like such a vague term. Sustainable farming. It also seemed pretty BSy because why wouldn't farming be sustainable? Plant a seed. Pick your crop. Plant a seed. Pick your crop. It seems pretty self-evident.

I was wrong.

Very wrong.

But, what's new about that?

---------------------------

While my brain is still working out the details for an upcoming post comparing sustainable farming practices to everything else I love in life, i.e. natural childbirth, breastfeeding and babywearing, I present to you a list of food documentaries (some are more devoted to sustainable farming than others....) for your viewing pleasure:

The Real Dirt on Farmer John

Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead

FRESH

The Future of Food

FRESH is only available via their website, The Future of Food is on Hulu and the remaining films are on Netflix Instant Viewing.

Let me know if I am missing a good movie!

Boys and Guns.

2011-10-16T13:23:00.002-05:00

I am not ashamed to be an over-protective mother.

I have been known to proudly state how I am just fine keeping my babies in a safe little bubble for several more years to come.

I mentally edit books I read out loud to vet out the negative, whiny, and mean characters and I always change words with negative connotations to words on my safe list.

Sometimes, I feel a little loony as I frantically race across the kitchen to turn off NPR as they describe a gun battle in Fallujah but I firmly believe words have power and sensitive little 3 year old ears have no need to hear a graphic description of war with bullets echoing in the background.

And, then there are the kids at the park. Oh, the kids at the park.

I'm not talking about my kids. The kids I've known since infancy. The kids whose mamas are my friends. The kids whom I know and approve of.

I'm talking about the kids with guns. Fake guns, yes. But, a fake gun may as well be a real gun when you are 3 years old and have no concept of violence and death. And, apparently, it only takes a few minutes of witnessing these fake guns in action for Henry to internalize the concept of shooting and "blowing away".

Long before my babies were born, I knew we would not be a "gun" house. As a teacher, I chastised little boys who were forever turning every math manipulative and piece of playground mulch into a weapon. Guns are not toys. Duh.

At this point, I've come to accept that boys are naturally drawn to weapons. Since this natural tendency to violence is completely foreign to me as a former little girl, I assume this hard wired trait is an evolutionary design hearkening back to the days of hunting for survival.

Or not. Who knows.

But, at least the thought of evolutionary psychology makes me feel better when my precious, sweet, tender little 3 year old is running around the house armed with a plastic giraffe, shouting "shot shot shot".

Seriously. My hearts breaks each time he "shot shot shot" at his sister.

I tell him, "Let's pretend that is a water hose and let's water your garden." Sometimes that works for a bit but before long he is shooting again.

I say, "Let's pretend that this a giant mixing spoon and let's mix up a big bowl of cookie dough." But, soon he is shooting.

I remind him that shooting is pretending to hurt and we don't want to hurt.

I attempt to ignore the shooting just like when we ignored his "oh, shit"s and "damn"s but the shooting pushes me over the edge and I can't seem to ignore it. And, after an afternoon of shooting following a morning of a rough little boy playing too roughly with a sensitive little sister, I tend to lose it. And, that's not good for anybody.

Advice? Words of wisdom?

Boy mamas, I need some guidance.

Hold her I will.

2011-10-13T06:00:00.001-05:00

A repost from last fall in honor of International Babywearing Week.

--------------

I wear my baby when.....

I want to cherish every moment of her babyhood.

She needs to sleep.

She is awake and grumpy.

We are grocery shopping.

We take walks around town.

I am cooking supper.

Her brother is acting crazy and wants to lay on top of her.

I need two hands.

I wear my baby because...

You can never spoil a baby by holding her too much.

She likes to be reminded of her 40 weeks on the inside.

She is my best accesory-

we almost named her "diamond studs".

She is still small enough to be worn nonstop.

I know she is safe and content when she is tied to me.

My movement helps develop her vestibular system.

I have a million reasons for wearing my baby.

But, really, they aren't even important.

She wants to be held

and

hold her,

I will.

Call me Oprah - kitchen edition

2011-10-12T13:15:00.000-05:00

Call me Oprah.

Here are some of my favorite (kitchen) things:

11 inch Cuisinart Pro Series food processor.

Love this thing and I have no idea how I lived with a dinky little food processor for so many years.

My mother was right; I needed the big one.

Hummus. Smoothies. Veggie purees. Bread and pizza dough.

The list goes on and on.

Le Creuset cast iron griddle.

My mother picked up this deeply discounted gem at a Le Creuset outlet store.

Eggs. Pancakes. Grilled cheese. Duck in a Bucket.

Like the food processor, lots and lots of uses.

Mixing bowls!

I have the whole set but the other 3 are dirty and I was too lazy to wash them for the picture.

I bought these at my local charity thrift store for $10.

They make me feel like a chef and they make me sad for people who mix without the proper equipment.

My Tivoli radio resides in my kitchen so I can listen to NPR and Dave Ramsey.

If I'm in the kitchen, it's on, so it's a kitchen tool in my book.

And, please notice how real I'm keeping it.

Like my mess?

The spray bottle might say Simple Green but this is

my vingar, tea tree oil, Dr. Bronner's soap and water cleaning mix.

Thank goodness it's a favorite thing of mine because something always needs cleaning this house.

Our house is a house of sticky messes and puddles of undetermined origins.

What are your favorite kitchen accouterments?

What matters.

2011-10-11T05:00:00.009-05:00

Welcome to the October Carnival of Natural Parenting: Money Matters
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama. This month our participants have shared how finances affect their parenting choices. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.
***

I am a Dave Ramsey devotee.

I listen to at least a portion of his radio show while Liza naps and I, with Henry's "help", prep dinner in the kitchen. I really like Dave Ramsey and I automatically think, "What would Dave do?" when confronted with a financial issue.

I feel very blessed to have been raised in a family setting that taught me to buy only what I can afford and never to use credit cards for things I can't afford. The frequency of deep debt callers to Dave's show have reinforced to me that my parents did a great job teaching financial responsibility.

Aside from his, ahem, recent political endorsements, I pretty much agree with everything Dave Ramsey says. And, that's the problem.

I listen for my daily money motivation and I want to have gazelle-like intensity in saving money and eventually building wealth. I want to move along, follow the baby steps and pay off our mortgage in record time.

Trust me. I really do.

But, the truth is......Dave is really stressing me out lately.

1 paycheck + 2 adults + 2 kids = Just enough money.

Just enough money + organic fresh whole foods = Impossible.

For years, I've preached to the choir that buying fresh whole foods is cheaper than buying processed boxed foods, i.e. a bunch of organic beets and basic pantry dry goods for homemade beet pancakes is sooo much cheaper and healthier than buying a family's worth of frozen pancakes from the freezer aisle.

But, now, I'm realizing my error......I never accounted for coupons and sales. If you wait a few weeks for the mystical time when coupons and sales collide, you can stock up on the next year's worth of pancakes for pennies on the dollar.

And, that will never happen with my organic beets, aluminum-free baking powder and unbleached flour. Never.Going.To.Happen.

We have a garden. We have chickens. We take part in a local CSA. We are even talking about buying a goat for fresh milk. We do what we can do. But, it's just not enough for me.

In order to feed my family a healthy, mostly organic diet, it costs a freaking fortune.

I blame the government. I blame subsidized corn crops. I blame the American people for falling into the belief that cheap and easy food is more important than healthy and sustainable food.

But, most of all, I blame Dave Ramsey for continually reminding me that in order to build wealth and eventually retire in dignity, sacrifices must be made.

When you already live a bare-bones little life, I refuse to sacrifice the quality of my family's diet in order to save a buck.

So, it looks like we will spending a bit longer than I initially anticipated in Baby Step #3.

But, I'm okay with that, as long as I have my beet pancakes and local honey to keep me company.

***
Visit Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!
Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

Money Matter$ — Jenny at I'm a full-time mummy shares her experiences on several ways to save money as a parent.
A different kind of life... — Mrs Green from Little Green Blog shares her utopian life and how it differs from her current one!
Show Me The Money! — Arpita of Up, Down & Natural shares her experience of planning for parenting costs while also balancing the financial aspect of infertility treatments.
Material v Spiritual Wealth - Living a Very Frugal Life with Kids — Amy at Peace 4 Parents shares her family's realizations about the differences between material and spiritual wealth.
If I Had a Money Tree — Sheila at A Gift Universe lists the things she would buy for her children if money were no object.
Financial Sacrifices, Budgets, and the Single Income Family — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama looks at the importance of living within your means, the basics of crafting a budget, and the "real cost" of working outside of the home.
Overcoming My Fear of All Things Financial — Christine at African Babies Don't Cry shares how she is currently overcoming her fear of money and trying to rectify her ignorance of all things financial.
Confessions of a Cheapskate — Adrienne at Mommying My Way admits that her cheapskate tendencies that were present pre-motherhood only compounded post-baby.
Money Matters — Witch Mom hates money; here's why.
Money? What Money?! — Alicia C. at McCrenshaw's Newest Thoughts describes how decisions she's made have resulted in little income, yet a green lifestyle for her and her family.
What matters. — Laura at Our Messy Messy Life might worry about spending too much money on the grocery budget, but she will not sacrifice quality to save a dollar.
Making Ends Meet — Abbie at Farmer's Daughter shares about being a working mom and natural parent.
Poor People, Wealthy Ways — Sylvia at MaMammalia discusses how existing on very little money allows her to set an example of how to live conscientiously and with love.
The Green Stuff — Amyables at Toddler In Tow shares how natural parenting has bettered her budget - and her perspective on creating and mothering.
Jemma's Money — Take a sneak peek at That Mama Gretchen's monthly budget and how Jemma fits into it.
5 Tips for How to Save Time and Money by Eating Healthier — Family meal prep can be expensive and time-consuming without a plan! Dionna at Code Name: Mama shares five easy tips for how to make your cooking life (and budget) easier.
Belonging in the Countryside — Lack of money led Phoebe at Little Tinker Tales towards natural parenting, but it also hinders her from realizing her dream.
Total Disclosure and Total Reform — Claire at The Adventures of Lactating Girl gets down to the nitty gritty of her money problems with hopes that you all can help her get her budget under control.
Save Money by Using What You Have — Gaby at Tmuffin is only good with money because she's lazy, has trouble throwing things away, and is indecisive. Here are some money-saving tips that helped her manage to quit her job and save enough money to become a WAHM.
Two Hippos & Ten Euros: A Lesson in Budgeting — MudpieMama shares all about how her boys managed a tight budget at a recent zoo outing.
ABBA said it — Laura from A Pug in the Kitchen ponders where her family has come from, where they are now and her hopes for her children's financial future.

Money vs. Time — Momma Jorje writes about cutting back on junk, bills, and then ultimately on income as well ~ to gain something of greater value: Time.
An Unexpected Cost of Parenting — Moorea at MamaLady shares how medical crises changed how she feels about planning for parenthood.
5 Ways This Stay at Home Mom Saves Money — Charise at I Thought I Knew Mama shares 5 self-imposed guidelines that help her spend as little money as possible.
Frugal Parenting — Lisa at My World Edenwild shares 8 ways she saves money and enriches her family's lives at the same time.
Conscious Cash Conscious — Zoie at TouchstoneZ shares her 5 money-conscious considerations that balance her family’s joy with their eco-friendly ideals.
Money, Sex and Having it All — Patti at Jazzy Mama explains how she's willing to give up one thing to get another. (And just for fun, she pretends to give advice on how to build capital in the bedroom.)
Money could buy me ... a clone? — With no local family to help out, Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama wants childcare so she can take care of her health.
Spending Intentionally — CatholicMommy loves to budget! Join her to learn what to buy, what not to buy, and, most importantly, where to buy.
New lessons from an allowance — Lauren at Hobo Mama welcomes a follow-up guest post from Sam about the latest lessons their four-year-old's learned from having his own spending money.
How to Homeschool without Spending a Fortune — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now shares tips and links to many resources for saving money while homeschooling from preschool through high school.
It's Not a Baby Crisis. It's Not Even a Professional Crisis. — Why paid maternity leave, you may ask? Rachael at The Variegated Life has some answers.
"Making" Money — Do you like to do-it-yourself? Amy at Anktangle uses her crafty skills to save her family money and live a little greener.
Money On My Mind — Luschka at Diary of a First Child has been thinking about money and her relationship with it, specifically how it impacts on her parenting, her parenting choices, and ultimately her lifestyle.
Spending, Saving, and Finding a Balance — Melissa at The New Mommy Files discusses the various choices she and her family have made that affect their finances, and finds it all to be worth it in the end.
Accounting for Taste — Cassie at There's a Pickle in My Life shares their budget and talks about how they decided food is the most important item to budget for.
Money Matters... But Not Too Much — Mamapoekie at Authentic Parenting shares how her family approaches money without putting too much of a focus onto it.
Parenting While Owning a Home Business — In a guest post at Natural Parents Network, Lauren at Hobo Mama lays out the pros and cons of balancing parenting with working from home.
Crunchy Living is SO Expensive...Or Is It? — Kelly at Becoming Crunchy talks about her biggest objection to natural living - and her surprise at what she learned.
Mo' Money, Mo' Problems — Sarah at Parenting God's Children shares how a financial accountability partner changed her family's finances.
The Importance of Food Planning — Amanda at Let's Take the Metro discusses how food budgeting and planning has helped her, even if she doesn't always do it.
Kids & Money: Starting an Allowance for Preschoolers — Kristin at Intrepid Murmurings discusses her family's approach and experiences with starting an allowance for preschoolers.

And, the winner is....

2011-10-10T14:01:00.001-05:00

Robyn at The Path We Travel!
I follow you in my google reader. I switched to baking soda from shampoo two weeks ago. I keep hearing that I will go through a gross adjustment stage, but so far, so good. :)

Robyn, I hope your hair is still looking good! I've been bragging on my no'poo a lot lately because I can actually go to sleep with wet hair now and wake up in the morning without a crazy frizzy mess of a head. It's pretty amazing.

Send me an email with your address to lmd328 (at) gmail (dot) com and I'll get your 4oz of Dr. Bronner's peppermint soap in the mail to you!

Thanks to everybody for commenting! THANK YOU for reading!

Positively Itchy.

2011-10-07T21:30:00.000-05:00

If I were a perfect parent, I would always:

1. Talk "to" my kids, rather than talk "at" them.

2. Say what I mean and mean what I say.

3. Get off my butt and get on my kids' level when I correct misbehavior.

4. Remember they are so little and the babies I love so much.

I'm certainly not a perfect parent.

Daily, I struggle with the most basic tenants of positive parenting ....um.... especially a few days ago when I was bound and determined for Liza's fall and winter clothes to be nice and organized, come hell or highwater, screaming kids or tantrums on the floor.

So yeah.

If you know me in real life or if you are a casual reader of OMML, you are perfectly aware of my struggle with balance just like every other mama out there.

But, I was seriously itching to dispense some basic parenting advice today at the pumpkin patch.

Thankfully, we managed a quick getaway from the corn box and the mama calling out her empty threats from the bench with the lure of a lunch packed in a dinosaur lunchbox and a picnic table with friends.

Now, the only itch that remains is our itchy ankles from our day at the farm.

Seriously.

This latest itch is quite concerning...

Friends. Food. Fail.

2011-10-06T21:40:00.000-05:00

These kids surely enjoyed my impromptu pasta salad dinner:

whole wheat rotini

package of pink salmon

shredded carrots

kalamata olives

red bell pepper

feta cheese

red onion

olive oil

red wine vinegar

And, just for good measure.....

Liza literally has no idea where her bellybutton is.

She points to a different spot every time you ask her and last night, s

he fell over looking for her bellybutton between her legs.

Hopefully, I can get a better and non-blurry picture tomorrow because it's things like this that remind me these babies grow up too quickly.

Beet Pancakes My Way

2011-10-04T19:58:00.000-05:00

If you are a OMML devotee, you know I really like my carbs.

In fact, I only half-jokingly refer to myself as a carbotarian.

So, it's no surprise I offer you yet another variation of the wonderful pancake.

And, I am hanging my head in shame for not taking a pretty picture of these bright pink pancakes......

Beet Pancakes My Way

1 cup all purpose flour

3/4 cups whole wheat flour

3 tbsp brown sugar

1 tbsp baking powder

1 tsp kosher salt

3/4 cups beet puree*

1 3/4 cups almond milk

1 egg

1 tsp vanilla

1. Mix dry ingredients.

2. Mix wet ingredients.

3. Add dry ingredients to wet ingredients and stir just until combined. Lumps are okay.

4. Ladle batter onto hot griddle and flip when bubbles appear around the edge.

5. Serve with local honey.

*How to puree beets:

Wash, peel and quarter beets. Bake on 400 until fork tender. Pulse in food processor until lumps are gone.

I pureed a large bunch of organic beets from my local grocery store and had enough puree for 3 batches of pancakes. Leftover puree can be frozen for future use.

Chicks and Contest Deadline!

2011-10-03T13:05:00.000-05:00

My plan was to take a picture of each of our 8 chickens.

Apparently, I forgot chickens are even more active than small children.

This not-very-well-thought-plan ended 50 blurry shots later,

with only one clear photo.

Thank you, Flopsie, for cooperating.

Is it as obvious to you as it is to me why her name is Flopsie?

We are now the proud owners of 8 hen:

Flopsie and Mopsie, Buff Orpingtons

Jessie the Jersey Giant

Lil Chick, Henrietta and Susie, Rhode Island Reds

Ramona and Corinna, Bantams

Anybody know why the Bantams are named Ramona and Corinna?

Every guess will count as an extra entry in my "Loving My Readers Giveaway" of a 4 ounce bottle of Dr. Bronner's peppermint soap.

Feel free to leave a comment on the original contest post if you haven't yet!

Contest winner will be announced Friday, October 7.

Doing better for myself.

2011-09-30T14:27:00.000-05:00

I fell into the trap.

The Motherhood Trap.

Everybody and everything became more important than me:

- saving the fruit for the kids because they need it more than me.

- scrimping on the grocery bill by eliminating things I like to eat for lunch.

- frantically hopping in and out of the shower as Liza screamed at my feet.

- falling into the interwebz once the kids were asleep just to zone out and sit on my butt.

- keeping the kids' rooms so neat and clean but my clothes and belongings are a mess.

- I literally stopped reading books because I didn't like how I can do nothing else until I have ravenously finished the book in as little time as possible.

Basically, I stopped doing things that are good for me because it just seemed like one more thing on my to-do list.

Sad, right?

I'm trying to do better.

My first big step is to focus on the food I eat. Food is my fuel and I expend a lot of energy. So, I need to eat plenty of healthy foods to fuel my body. It seems so logical, especially considering the fact I feed my children fresh and whole foods all.day.long so their bodies and minds can run in their optimal state.

My body deserves that respect too and since I began paying attention to making sure I eat well-balanced meals with plenty of protein and dark leafy greens for my iron levels....I feel so much better and I have much more energy. Duh.

Now, my goals are:

1. Continue my new habit of showering at night.

2. Reading books again.....and changing my habit of obsessing until the book is complete.

3. Find better things to do with my time after the kids asleep at night.

4. Keep my room neat and tidy and actually put away my clothes so they aren't a big wrinkly mess which relegates me back to the t-shirts and jeans because I'm too lazy to iron.

I thoroughly enjoyed my delicious green smoothie made of lots of spinach, a banana, frozen mangos and peaches and local honey.

Maybe that pile of my clothes in the background will get folded soon.

I suppose that could become my new nighttime activity.

Or not....

All day long, I say...

2011-09-28T19:41:00.001-05:00

I blatantly stole this post idea from Amanda at Gratefully Growing in Grace. I loved it!

All day long, I say........

I love you.
Sit down, Sis! As she teeters on her tippy toes in her high chair.
Thank you.
Be gentle, Henry.
Little sisters need lots of space.
Don't kick the cat!
Let's go change this diaper.
Good job!
Want a snack?
Please.
Ooooh, I like that!
Henry, where is my phone? He knows 9/10 times.....I know 2/10 times.
Do you need to tee tee?
Hmm, I don't know what Tripper is doing right now.
Want to go on a walk?
Let's go get a new book at the Palmer Home! We love our charity thrift store. Daily.
Would you like to rest on the couch? The answer is always an emphatic 'no'.
I like that, Henry!
When did you get so big?
Please just be quiet for a minute for your mama to rest.
Sure, let's read a book.
Eh, go choose a better book for me to read.
Let's go check to see if the chickens have laid us an egg!
We do not slam the door in our sister's face!
Let's clean this mess up first.
What do you think your daddy would say?
I love you.

Yeasty Diaper Rash Solved

2011-09-26T21:25:00.001-05:00

Liza has battled a yeasty diaper rash since she was just a little baby. I remember very red diaper area creases her first few months and then just a general redness. That mixed with her dairy-induced eczema on her butt and upper thighs makes for a sad picture of a cute little baby butt.

About a month ago, she developed a raging diaper rash. I took her out of cloth and slathered her with diaper creams and she wore disposable diapers for a few days. Eventually, I took her to see our Nurse Practitioner who quickly proclaimed the rash as yeast. The rash quickly disappeared with prescription strength antifungal......and then, reappeared the next week. I used the cream for a few days and the rash quickly went away.....and then, reappeared just a few days later.

At that point, I knew we had a problem. The prescription cream was simply treating the symptom, not addressing the problem. And, the frequent use of the prescription cream seemed to make her skin break down easily because by the 2nd round of use, she had several little sores develop that stayed even after the rash was gone.

Actually, I probably should have realized we had a problem before that point but I'm doing the best I can do. I'm just glad I identified the problem when I did.

I knew Candida was the problem but I simply didn't know where to start or what to do. I knew her diapers needed something and I knew she needed something and I knew I was thankful for the yeast not transferring to her mouth and my breasts in the form of Thrush but I was getting no where on my own.

Thank goodness for good friends!

My friend, Mandi, swooped in and gave me very helpful advice, which I used to google more helpful advice and then I developed a plan:

1. I washed her cloth diaper with a healthy shake of Tea Tree Oil, known for its antifungal properties. Then because yeast hates sun, I left them on the clothesline for the duration of a very sunny and hot day.

2. I started both kids on probiotics. Even with the yeast, Liza's gut must have been nicely balanced because she had no issues at all starting the probiotics whereas it gave Henry's little tummy a run for it's money for the first few weeks.

3. For 3 days, Liza was completely off fruits and carbohydrates to decrease the sugar in her body that the yeast thrive on. Um, yeah. I quickly realized all this baby eats is fruit and carbs. Lets just say she ate lots of green peas and nursed nonstop during those few days.

4. I ditched the prescription strength anti-fungal and popped several liquid capsules of Oil of Oregano, and mixed it with coconut oil to create a natural and effective antifungal diaper cream.

5. Remember the sores I mentioned? Those little spots now get a healthy smearing of Lansinoh Lanolin before I apply the Oil of Oregano coconut oil to her entire bottom. Thanks, Karen, for that suggestion! And, everything I use is cloth diaper safe which makes it even better!

So, yeah.

Her cute little tush is completely free of red creases and red streaks. It's nice thing to see and even nicer knowing that I took an all-natural approach to healing her

And, I have to say that learning about these natural approaches is addictive.....and I've been in need of a new hobby.

Harmonica Girl

2011-09-25T11:05:00.001-05:00

Liza is practicing hard for her big gig.

She studiously practices her harmonica day and night.

Well, maybe it's not always so studious.

Sometimes a girl just has to rock it out.

Practicing is important but learning about the harmonica's structure and design is important too.

Rock on, baby girl!

Power Cookies My Way

2011-09-23T13:31:00.001-05:00

They might resemble a cow patty but they are:

yummy, nutritious, flexible, quick and easy,

i.e., my favorite way to cook.

This is one of the recipes where I can't even pretend to know the measurement for each ingredient.

I just eyeball it and make sure there is enough honey to satisfy my sweet-toothed boy.

Power Cookies My Way

Natural peanut butter

Wheat germ

Ground flax seed

Rolled Oats

Honey

Coconut Manna

Cocoa

1. Mix ingredients together, using peanut butter as the base, until your cookies firm enough to shape and eat.

At the park.

2011-09-21T20:49:00.000-05:00

I finally charged up my camera battery after contemplating the event for almost an entire week.

We headed to the park and I was bound and determined to get a picture of my children:

standing in the same frame

smiling

looking in the same direction.

I called this picture a winner.

Since that unenviable task was complete, I headed over to Little Miss Camera Ham.

She smiled and posed.

Cute, right?

Even cuter when she kissed that cute baby in the mirror.

And, kiss she did.

Henry, not much a poser.

Or a smiler.

But, unbeknownst to him, I snapped this sweet picture of him watching the big kids play.

Then it was time to hunt for dinosaurs.

Can you tell he is walking very slowly and very quietly as not to disturb any prehistoric creatures?

Liza was good with this plan because she found some mud to play in and her dress turned out to be quite camouflaging amongst the decomposing leaves and pine needles.

No dinosaur is going to get this girl wearing her earth tone autumn dress.

Still hunting and getting a little perturbed at the lack of dinosaurs in our local park.

Ooooh.

A dinosaur egg.

This was a good find because Henry didn't really want to find a big dinosaur anyway.

Nice dinosaur stick!

Oooh, a "real" dinosaur egg!

Not a "pretend" one like that that previous find.

Me: Anything in the egg, Henry?

Henry: Jus dis money.

Score!

After that we chased this abnormally slow moving and tolerant of young children butterfly for at least 10 minutes.

Then, it was time to go home.

Sad, right?

But, the best part of it all is that we go to the park daily so we can recreate out big adventure any old time.

Well....except for the cash and the slow moving butterfly.

That was pretty special!

Soap as Toothpaste and a Giveaway!

2011-09-20T14:20:00.000-05:00

Apple cider vinegar and baking soda as shampoo...

Coconut oil as moisturizer...

Olive oil, just a dab, in my hair in lieu of hair gel...

Homemade deodorant of coconut oil, baking soda and corn starch...

The only thing lacking in my natural personal hygiene department has been toothpaste.

I gave up Crest and Colgate years ago and these days, commerical brand toothpastes seem so fake-tasting and leave a funny film in my mouth. At Mr. Messy's urging, I began buying Tom's of Maine toothpaste. Whenever I run across a sale on Tom's I stock up and we are good for the next few months. But, this last time the toothpaste was all used up, no sale in sight and our bee-roke bank account on my mind.

So, I googled and experimented. For a few weeks, we used a coconut oil, baking soda and a few drops of peppermint essential oil mix. I was okay with the baking soda flavor but the texture was all wrong. A friend suggested adding some olive oil to smooth it out and that helped but by that point, I was really missing the lather and bubbles of real toothpaste.

I remembered reading about using Dr. Bronner's liquid peppermint soap as toothpaste and a friend validated that it does not taste soap and that it lathers up nicely. So, we gave it a try.

Ding! Ding! Ding!

We have a toothpaste winner and trust me, I'm entirely too excited about it all.

The Dr. Bronner's fulfills all of my toothpaste requirements:

cheap, natural, lathering and not bad tasting.

Henry is really into brushing his teeth lately AKA as eating the toothpaste off his toothbrush. so I give him a little dollop of his kid's Tom's of Maine toothpaste and then add a few drops of Dr. B's on his toothbrush to beef up his pitiful attempt at brushing his own teeth.

So, yeah. We are all loving the Dr. Bronner's peppermint soap as toothpaste.

So.....I want to give away a 4 ounce bottle of Dr. B's peppermint soap to use as you wish! You can use it as toothpaste, mix it 50/50 with water in a pump bottle for hand soap, add it to your vinegar cleaning spray, whatever floats your boat.

And, isn't it convenient that I have my "Loving My Readers Giveaway" just dangling in the air that I never wrapped up. Nice, right? Gotta love my procrastinating ways.

How to win:

1. Make sure you follow OMML.

2. Comment on this post.

3. Earn an extra entry if you were one of my fabulous readers that posted on original "Loving My Readers Giveaway" post.

I love my readers more than I love my, ummm, toothpaste.

Midwifery: To regulate or not?

2011-09-19T07:48:00.000-05:00

Midwives and consumers of midwifery services divide into two camps:

Those who believe midwives should practice without government interference and those who support governmental regulation of midwifery.

If you speak to a supporter of midwife autonomy, you will likely hear about the age-old tradition of midwives practicing independent of regulation. These supporters also worry about regulations keeping midwives from attending VBACs, twin and triplet births, breech births and pregnancies that exceed 42 weeks. Worries include requiring a back-up ob, midwives having to purchase malpractice insurance and phasing out direct-entry midwives, among other concerns.

I get these issues. Really, I do. As long as informed consent is practiced every step of the way, I believe a woman and her midwife should be the only ones to decide if she risks out of a homebirth. I also appreciate that midwives have traditionally practiced free of regulation and that concerns of regulation will limit, rather than expand, a midwife's ability to work with women and babies and I chose a direct-entry midwife to attend Liza's birth. So yeah. I understand the worries.

But, I am a firm supporter of governmental regulation of midwifery:

1. My home state of Mississippi has no law on the books about midwifery. Yet, every surrounding state has midwifery laws. Therefore, Mississippi has become a safe-haven for midwives with bad outcomes in other states. This is not obviously not safe for mamas or babies.

2. In Mississippi, anybody can advertise midwifery services, regardless of experience or training. Attend some births......catch some babies.....does not a midwife make.

3. As the poorest state with the worst neonatal outcomes and the lowest rates of prenatal care and breastfeeding, giving women more access to midwifery care makes a lot of sense in regards to mother friendly/baby friendly care and in regards to a financially viable way to improve healthcare to women in rural areas of the state with little to no access to ob/gyns.

4. States with birth laws in favor of midwives and homebirths have large numbers of midwives. Finding an experienced midwife with positive outcomes is a good thing but having the ability to interview multiple midwives to find an experienced midwife with positive outcomes who also meshes with your family dynamics is a great thing.

5. Currently in Mississippi, face-to-face interviews and word-of-mouth is the only way to validate a midwife's birth outcome history. The ability to log-in to a database to check for filed grievances against a midwife helps keep women and babies safe.

So, yeah. I am firmly planted in the pro-regulation camp. And, that's why I am dedicating my time and service as a board member of Mississippi Friends of Midwives.

Interested in learning more or making a donation to an important cause?
Check out www.msfriendsofmidwives.com for more details!

Are you a supporter of government regulated midwifery?

What are the birth laws like in your state?

This boy:

2011-09-15T09:23:00.000-05:00

This boy:

is 37 months old.
loves fruit and carbohydrates the best. Berries, the favorite. Melons, the least.
really likes moths.
pretends! Yesterday he was a butterfly, moth, lion and a possum.
sleeps with his daddy at night but does just fine when Mr. Messy is out of town.
started Speech Therapy again this week. His speech is so much better but still needs a little help.
thinks Tripp and his cousin, Jobe, are the coolest kids he has ever met in his life.
sits rearfacing in the car even when sits between the two carseats. It's pretty cute to see.
plays better with a stick and a pile of dirt than with real toys.
still loves his trains but they are rarely played with because they have to stay safe in his room.
is really into dinosaurs lately.
observes and hears everything around him.
thinks you are supposed to say "damn" when something drops or breaks.
proudly announced he is "tree" and "Lulu is one." when asked his age.
finally proved he can count to ten when he counted 10 freshly baked cookies. He just needed a little motivation to perform.
does quite well without a nap these days.
loves books more than anything else in the world. He can sit and listen as long as you can sit and read.
is so so so so sweet.
is so so so so cute.
is so so so very much loved!

This girl

2011-09-14T05:00:00.001-05:00

This girl.......

is 13 months old
loves fruit and carbohydrates
signs: water, thank you, cat, dog, airplane, more, wash, swing, eat, hat, horse, fish
plays on the equipment at the park all by herself....and has only fallen down the steps once
thinks her brother is the best thing ever
has recently gotten very grabby and demanding about nursing when and where she wants to
loves pulling a cushion off the couch so she can have a seat that is easy to get in and out of
enjoys playing in the dirt as much as big brother
has had a yeasty diaper rash for forever and I just identified thrush on her tongue -- more on that later
rides in the stroller only for her daddy
enjoys reading books as much as everybody else in her little family
loves loves loves cats and dogs
has 2 molars, with #3 and 4 cutting as we speak
gives open mouth kisses with her tongue out
pinches and scratches my collarbone while she nurses to sleep - ow!
is so very very cute
is so very very sweet
is so very very much loved!